"PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?" -- Office Space
Status: ruminating.
Sex: male Age: 24 Location: Camden,,
Ohio, United States
Member since: July 20, 2009 Account: Free Account Orientation: Straight Status: In a relationship Occupation: University student Recruited By:lovely_messy_girl
I'm one who lies awake at night because he can't keep the thoughts out of his head long enough to find peace even on the darkest, quietest nights. One who begs for the rain to fall and drown out the silence that mocks him whenever he closes his eyes. I'm one who stares up at a shadowy ceiling to finally achieve the clarity to make sense of things, only to find that still nothing seems right. I'm one who longs for solitude but fears its silence.
I've lived in rural Ohio all my life, but I've always felt estranged from the local flavor. There is no poetry and therefore no appeal for me in oversized trucks, buckets of mud, and rambunctious behavior. This is my home and will always hold a special place in my heart, but I always find myself yearning for a locale more refined. Perhaps the place I'm looking for doesn't really exist. I've yet to find any place where I truly feel comfortable.
I'm uncomfortable around crowds, and most of my time is spent in isolation, just the way I like it. Don't mistake this for misanthropy -- I don't dislike other people; I just prefer to not be around them. Most people don't seem to understand this feeling, but it's all I've ever known. Nevertheless, once in a while I love to go out for something special like a musical performance. I'm able to equally appreciate a deafening rock concert in a smoky bar or a magnificently-orchestrated symphony, and I'd love to attend an opera or ballet if only I could find others around here with similar interests.
I'm a university student and love it, but maybe not for the reasons you'd think. The campus environment is the closest I've felt to belonging somewhere, and one thing I love more than anything else is learning. Some days I will sit outside and breathe deeply of the crisp autumn air, using my free time to clear my thoughts and reflect on where I'm going and where I've been... I don't engage in some of the typical college behavior. I have other ways to spend my time.
I suppose I'm somewhat old-fashioned. I enjoy exchanging long-winded, expressive letters... through email, since I'm also too impatient to wait on the postal system. I want to take someone out to a moonlit clearing in the woods and waltz with her at midnight. Society has lost its elegance to psychology, positivism, economics, and other demons. If only I could find another old soul such as mine. I've always enjoyed writing and have been told that I have a natural talent for it, but it's only been recently that I've decided to dedicate myself to it and improve my ability. I mostly write fiction, but I also dabble in poetry when I'm in a certain mood and the stars align properly. I'm trying to forge the discipline to write more often, because I'd love to write professionally.
One of my favorite academic pursuits is to read and understand philosophy, especially the works of Plato. Studying philosophy has really helped me put everything in perspective and live a meaningful life, and I think reading philosophy could help anyone. Unless you're reading nihilist philosophy, in which case at least you're reading something. Just kidding, nihilists!
Feel free to add or send me a message! I may enjoy my solitude, but that doesn't mean I don't like talking to people. If that doesn't make any sense, then don't blame me.
Likes
Solitude, Italian food, cats, politics, philosophy, intellectuals, writing, literature, guns, video games
Dislikes
Rubes
Favorite Music
Classical, Baroque, Romantic-era music Symphonic metal Rock in general
Bands: Battlelore, Epica, Eyes of Eden, Kamelot, Lacuna Coil, Nightwish, Sirenia, Tristania, Within Temptation... and many others.
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