Sometimes...you just feel like writing about things that don't fit anywhere else. I've had a very busy life, having to take care of myself early and learn how to survive the hard way. I don't like sharing my past with people because when i do, they always want to apologize, as if it were their fault. Or they act as if they feel sorry for me, and i hate that. If not for how my life was, growing up, i would not be the same person i am today. I wouldn't be as open minded, or as outspoken as I like to be. You see, everything i believe in comes from personal experiences that i've had in my life. I can't just take somebody elses word for it. i have to experience things myself...and i have.
I was born into one of those stereotypical broken homes..and by the time i was six years old, the paternal side of my genetic makeup died. I have no regrets in saying that i truely hate that person. He was worthless, and so are his decaying bones. My mom met a guy later and he helped to raise me and my brother. I am glad that there was a decent father figure in my life during those next ten years. He was a strict catholic, and I had to abide by his rules, but he was a good guy. His name is Ron and because of him, i learned that there really are kind, selfless people in this world..
When i was sixteen, my mom fell very ill and died. It ended up tearing her family apart, because of me and my brother, and who should raise us. Ron couldn't legally take us, because he and my mom never married. Her brother, my uncle, saw our social security checks and our annuity, and thinking that he might be able to get rich off of this, gladly accepted me and my brother into his household. I saw through this and was kicked out after only two weeks. I moved in with my aunt melanie, and together, she and i went to court to get my brother from my uncle. Along the way, we decided that I should get emancipated, so that i could gain legal custody of my brother. So i did. After a year's worth of court battles, my brother was given to some relatives of ours, where he lived and went to school in north carolina.
I went ahead and started my life, got myself a place to live, and got a few jobs to support myself. A few years later, i tried to join the military, only to find it not to my liking, and got myself out of there as soon as i could. After i was separated, I got on a bus and spent three and a half days riding from Chicago, IL, to Va Beach, Va.
Once i got home, I packed up my car and drove, not knowing where my life would take me. I thought of going out west. Phoenix, AZ sounded like a good place to start over. So i started driving....
And then the fucker broke down on me! I was stuck in south carolina with no way to go anywhere. I knew i had to survive, so i got a job, waiting tables at a diner that was in front of a hotel. Everyday, for a year and a half, i used my tips to rent a room. Eventually, i was able to meet somebody that had a place for rent, and i got an apartment.
Now that i was able to live a little less day to day, i was able to do things I couldn't do before. I was able to save money, go out, get a better job, and actually have a little bit of fun. Eventually, I ended up with a girlfriend. After we were together for a few years, we moved away from Charleston, to live in Florence, which was her home town.
Well, relationships don't work the way anyone wants. It seemed that the girl i was dating was so far up her family's ass that she let them run her life. I wouldnt have it, so we split up.
Florence wasn't anything close to what i was used to. I missed the city life. I couldn't stand being in a small town where everything closed after 9pm. I started calling that town "the funeral home" because it seemed that only old people lived there, and they just wasted away, waiting to die. It was more than a little depressing.
Times got tough living in that small town, alone, but i wanted to at least meet people. I started hitting the profile sites, including this one. Eventually, i met Lucy, and we dated for a few months. She was the best thing for me at the time. After that summer, when she had to go back to college, she left me with a few words that stuck with me to this day. She told me that i was better than "this", meaning the town, my life, my job, and everything else.
She was absolutely right. I was starting to get sucked into the depressing town, and her words gave me the drive I needed to leave it. I got so sick of my job, and the way i was treated there, that i quit on the spot. I called up Shannon, who i met here on VF. She lived in North Carolina, so I asked her to find a place for me up here. I explained the entire situation to her so that she knew i was coming to stay. With some help from Lucy, I was able to leave the state of South Carolina forever...and good riddance.
I stayed in Jacksonville, NC for a full year, but I knew it would only be temporary. I got a job working at a diner again, because I had the experience from when I lived in Charleston. I decided to take the time and save up a good bit of money so that when the time was right, I'd be able to move away for good. It took almost a year, but i finally saved up what I needed, gave away all of my furniture, and took a bus to Chicago, where I stayed for about 2 months. Then, after not being able to find a job, I sold everything I had, and moved to Phoenix, AZ, the same place i had wanted to go when i had first left home. Everything had finally come full circle, and I was going to begin my life with a fresh start.
I'm not sure what will happen next. I am certain to have many more adventures, gains, losses, and everything else in between. However, No matter what I may come across, no matter what I have to go through, knowing what I've done in my life so far has shown me one thing. By believing in myself, anything, if not everything, is possible.