[31/03/10]
These are my thoughts on certain subjects as of the 31 of the 3 month of 2010.
[school]
I wake up every morning, to go to a place where they tell me all the things I'm to stupid to know. I feel terrible in every class. I go to art class to be bored, I go to native studies to have no friends- no partners, I go to Ela to feel stupid, I go to math to feel lost and stupid, I go to music to feel lost and untalented. Then the cycle repeats itself the next day. How am I suppose to keep going back to that place if nothing good comes out of it? I haven't been at school for the whole month of March now. Since I left I feel less pressure to learn certain things before the year is over, but the feeling of aloneness is still there.
[piercings/hair]
For years I've been trying to impress friends by wearing what they wear. By mid 2008 I finally changed myself to what I thought I wanted to be. I started getting piercings because it felt good and temporarily made the pain go away. Before I changed myself to how I wanted to be, I felt invisible, alone, and un-liked. After I changed myself, I made new friends and people started to give me more attention. I enjoyed it for a while, until I remembered, they don't like me for my personality, if they did,
[outlook on life]