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Suicide Urge
(I want to die sometimes....)

I feel cold metal at my temple,
At least it ain't a pimple.
The hammer slides back,
Soon someone's gonna get whacked.
What's that you say,
It's time to pay.
Oops, pulled the trigger,
It's okay, I never liked my figure.
Aww, pathetic me that's drool,
In my own blood pool.

Suicide may not be the answer.
But it sure seems like fun.
Why don't you join me.
Just pick up the gun when I'm done

Downed some phenegrin pills,
Hope you've made out your wills.
Is that Jack gotta get that,
Don't Drink beer, it'll make u fat.
Where's my mirror and line of coke,
God, its really easy to self choke.
Can't find the Tylenol bottle,
Headed at the cliff full throttle.
Tie up my arm, morphine injection time,
I'm a monster, a demon, maybe even a mime.



He Steers
(No Direction for me to in life....)

Curve my addiction to misery,
how would you like some tea.
Craven a world not here,
If I died would you shed a tear.
Your insults are like stings of a bee,
you hate cause your jealous of me
I don't like anyone to be near,
is there anything good left to fear.
Its time that I go to sea,
Hop the ferryman hasn't changed his fee.
I feel like I'm missing a gear,
I wish everyone was a little queer



Horny Dead Man
(haha Idk really what inspired this)

Can you heal my bleedn heart
someone has shot it with a poison dart
shaking, I think I'm going into shock
god this hurts bad, anyone a doc.

Wish this didn't happen at the quickie-mart
guess I can't return my shoppin cart
I bet this is gonna be easy to mock
all I can think about is will this affect my cock.

Ooh, that nurse is a little pop tart
got to concentrate, I don't want to fart
maybe I should try not to gawk
when I open my mouth, the words don't talk.

They're prepping for surgery, this is gonna smart
hope this isn't goodbye nurse, just a start
She really had a great pair of stalks
I bet she gets hit on by all the docs.

Its sad really, that we have to part
and we had only just begun to lark
this is totally random, I'm missing a sock
Guess I'm dead, r.i.p.ing under a big rock.



RANDOM ONES

I'm drowning in a sea of humanity,
How can anyone keep their sanity.
I'm criminal, please give amnesty.
I'd like you save for your vanity.
Can't seem to integrate humanity.
Some think I'm a classic insanity.
Do I need to say yes, your majesty.
Liken me for me would be tragedy.

BREAK

you tie me up and torture me
you know how much I like it
you want a ring, we'll have to see
you don't like us, I don't give a shit
you crave me too much my love
you look too hard for happily ever after
you need to be free, like a dove
you could use some humor and laughter

BREAK

There's dark days ahead
And i need you in bed
Did I take my med
I feel heavy as lead
Of course I'm well read
Don't take what I said
With humor that's shed
I have to be fed
Need a ring thee wed
People ask why I'm so dark,
I tell em I got raped in the dark,
I was high, she was a narc,
Your a wuss is a common remark.

BREAK

Wondering why I try
I'm pounding on the gate
path before me, is hid
I think I'm dead inside
is it my fate to wait
until I'm old, what's your bid

BREAK

I like to read, I like Intellect
hahahaha
I like to write, I like humor
hahahaha
Where my peeps
hahahaha
sendn a call out
hahahaha
Oops they're stay at home geeks



4 Melle4

How to drink my jack with water back
I'm lacking civility and tact
Macintosh impossible to hack
Have I mentioned you pack a nice rack
Use a potato sack for your vac
Don't yak to much you'll step on a tack
Rhyming my knack, I deserved a smack.



3 unlabeled

Lost in an endless world of possibility
To the wind of change & unforeseen prosperity
Wrapped up with confusion & lack of lifestyle dexterity

Never knowing what tomorrow will bring
What could I do with no ability to sing
Growing up in a sea of gangsters, hoes and bling

Certainty& paths unplanned
I got and airstrip but no plane to landed
Shall I do what I want or wait to be commanded



Fakers

Lie to me, tell me I can change the world
Lie to me, tell me I'm special
Lie to me, Lie to me
Tell me I'm attractive, tell me I'm a winner
Let the world reality body check
My beatin and bloody carcass
Into the broken wall of truth



Crutch

I can't go outside without fears
Got a heart beating way too fast
Hurts so much it brings me to tears
Hate this life, not meat to last
So sick of @ss-holes & their beers
Have a boat without any mast
Behind my eyes you see turning gears
Our minds are infinite &vast
But we can't overcome some jeers
I've got wounds to heal from my past



3 or three or III

running away is so easy for me
its all i've ever known in my short span
bad habits are common in the world of today
so i'm being lazy, watch hours of tv
I don't got will enough to stand
who cares what i do, i still gotta say
that is unless free speech has a new fee
hope for your sake, you got a guardsman
cause i'm about ready to make you pay
humanity is weird, haven't found it's key
everybody loves one another, like fans
not me though, i'd rather not be gay
gues it's just the way in which i see
if were up to me, i'd bury you all in sand
you should feel great, that i can't have my way



My Sister Katie

I lost my sis when I was eight
Her dad took her away
I've never said goodbye, even this late
How I wish for one more day
You should know her name was Kate
I had so many things to say
Losing her made my head fill with hate
Why? did I miss something I had to pay
She trapped my emotions like bait
All my days now are dark and gray
I can't stand that I was given this fate
So much pain I carry through today
I wana ask god why; I'll just have to wait



Is it me again?

Why am I here in this war of life
Everyone tells me I'm supposed to fight
What can be accomplished at the end of a Knife
How would I know wrong from right

I cant stand the sight of my face
But I just cut at my legs instead
Do they really want me in the rat race
Poised to put me under they're tread

Am I the only one who sees it
How the masses eliminate the weak
I'd speak but I'm afraid to get hit
I don't know what to seek

I got a hole breaking my heart
Do I endure this terrible pain
Depression is tearing me apart
Will it ever leave or wane

I'm just a spoiled suburbanite loser
No one bothers to care
You drink to much stupid boozer
Are people like me really that rare

Why do I feel old at twenty-four
Vanity or a premonition of my fate
Sometimes I feel like such a whore
But for me It's probably too late

I'm looking at the ground
Three-hundred feet isn't that far
I definitely don't want to be found
Down the hole I go for par

Don't think I was meant to be alive
Go ahead push me a little more
And maybe I'll take an asphalt dive
Could be that'll settle the score

I'm rambling now to my own tune
I don't have nuts on my menu
Borderline-personality disorder make me a loon
So let the craziness continue



Vile Testament

I reek of hypocrisy and false pretenses
A wonder I don't shatter mirrors with just a glance
How would you feel in this face, body and soul
You'd scream to breakout no matter the method
Am I a run away?

Retched & uninvited we are in this world
Why couldn't I have been aborted
I must be one of God's little mistakes
Some crimes are too unforgivable for sanctifying
Am I a criminal?

Illusions are my stock & trade, but if you only knew what I'm hiding
A swift death would come for me at your request
I'm sure you'd be delighted without my presence
It doesn't stop me, I continue on creating new desecrations
Am I the manifestation of true evil?

May my death be the last one I cause
I was bred for a purpose, I'm beginning to perceive
But will it be as the prophesy of my mind has deemed
All burnt up in flame & fright, when the killing starts
Am I the anti-christ?



Why I love and hate Shannon

I love you from afar
You were once my friend
Why'd you leave me be
Afraid of what I could say
I don't know what I did wrong
Do I got to be dying for you to respond
Cause that's the only time we talk
Know your with someone else
Doesn't matter, I know my heart
The only person I get mad at is you
So obviously its cause you matter most
I've wanted you from the start
Even when I was with your sis
But I guess I don't deserve you attention
It's not like I bothered telling you
That I wish you were mine
Guess this is my fault for wanting
I cant have you & you think I'm an ass
Think your kindness to me is fake
You barely speak unless I make you
My love isn't that important
Only a glimmer in the dark



For Shanon who I love n hate

Hey what does EMO mean anyways
Sum think its gay, I don't know what to say
I'm shades of gray, do you like sunshine rays
I saw a blue jay only yesterday
Dream I'm laying in a pile of hay
What's a bay, that's lacking sandy wet quays
Sum shout yay with that rest calling for nay
You better pay cause your out come may.



Weaknesses

what is it that makes us so frail
whining tell we get our way
or so there's nothing to pay

we all seem to cry and wail
could be its all not real
simply a ticket for the meal

I think its a veil
covering our insecurities
some other looming possibilities

or some kind of a fake bail
lack of attention span
or a more devious plan

I put my head to the rail
no train coming though
I look to and fro

oh shit its beginning to hail
I guess we all need to defend
from hurts that are hard to mend

no matter how hard you scream and yell
your only a human being
and will only get so much meaning

from the hammer smashing the nail
trapped by society's protocol
that and lots of alcohol

my only escape is to set sail
with pens and parchment
in my tiny apartment

I stay in to write which makes me pale
I don't like it out there anyways
its so easy to keep to oneself nowadays

is it wrong to wish to fail?
expectation is so very high
why should I even try

everyday I walk along a nature trail
its very peaceful sometimes
to see all the cedars and pines

bet I end up in some jail
making license plates for the state
I know I don't have a good fate

but then again its only the start of the tale
might turn out alright
but I haven't the slightest insight

time to check my mail
oh good more bad news letters
I had almost forgot I'm I debtor

maybe I just find the holy grail
new that's just fiction
messing with my diction

if had the grades I could've gone to yale
then I wouldn't be poor and fruitless
just rich and hopeless



Problematical Existence

The people who love me
I hate absolutely
& the people I love
Seem apathetic to my feelings
I really don't know why it is I even try to love anyways

It makes no difference whether I'm alive or not
I'm not special or important
Nothing I do will be remembered
I'm nearly a complete failure of a human
If I die today only one person would attend the funeral

you ever feel like you must have been dreadful in a previous life
Like you murdered so many people
The karma will screw you for eternity
It's like I'm reliving the same day over & over
Too bad its the worst one of my pathetic lifetime

Emotional pain is so high I got to hurt myself physically to distract myself from it
Cutting deep so it needs stitches
Scratching tell I've bleed all over my hands
Breaking veins to make my skin bruise black & blue
I can't feel my hands from pounding my knuckles on my desk

If god exists up there in some kind or heaven
Then it didn't want me
& I should seek the devil
Maybe I'd be welcome in hell
It can't be any worse than where I am now

What's our over-populated cesspool of a planet up to
One blip in six-billion plus
Seems like I'd be saving the planet
With a sacrifice to ensure one less mouth to feed
People have major issues with keeping there hands off each other

So what if I'm a cynic
Like you aren't
Its just the inevitable response today
Why support a world that doesn't care about anyone
Unless they're rich, attractive, super talented or all of the above

Don't mind me over here being invisible
It's okay
I wouldn't speak to you anyway
I bet your fake & will betray me the first chance you get
Not like being a real, honest & introspective persona is worth something

Why not build character then I ask
Oh yeah your lazy
Stupid me to forget that you'd rather
Go tanning, get plastered, slut around & listen to hip-hop
Sorry if I offend your vane, selfish, waste of a valuable life, nope I'm not

So much frivolousness I don't understand
I mean come on
It makes me want to puke
How could I love that or get any love in return
with so much of there love directed at themselves, none is left for me

I have a death wish not like you think
Its not selfish to want another life
When yours is as depressing as mine is everyday
Is it so bad to need to end the pain or life to see what else there maybe
A release is all I need for I think I can be more meaningful in death then in life



Sacrifice

I would die
Die all for you
Relinquish my soul
Damaged beyond repair
My tragic anesthetization
Burning hope fades to black
Crushingly heavy conscience pains
Released out of my animated carcass
Liberation for my tormented life
Lacerate my veins too deep
Make it bleed brutally
Blood to infuse you
Shift of power
Drain tell I'm dry
Soak up all I contain
Don't want to be coming back
Love wasted
Dimming lights
Essence leaving me
Thoughts turn to god
Could religion be accurate
Is there some phenomenon near
Sight blurred in a flash
Thirst takes hold
Oh it isn't god at all
Turning has transpired
Trusted it not to fledge me
Yet another betrayal in evidence
Again & again this pattern
False expectations
Humans no different
Hate consumes all that is left
Now & forever
Scarred core of being
Initiates journey for peace
Roaming aimlessly throughout
Traded an existence for another one
Didn't know screwing up death possible
Proved myself wholly wrong
Truly hellish this end
So tired still
Please let it end
Lay down to sleep
Bring my next death
Never conscious again
Worth evacuated the universe
Invisible pain is too much
Cursed by endurance



Lost

My soul has died
At least I tried
It was to myself that I lied
Love that was vied
The tears streak
Making me weak
Cant speak
Heart pain makes me meek
Haven't the strength to stand
Man of the unsuitable brand
Constantly out of hand
Even if I made a hundred grand
Low and broken hearted
Love I shouldn't have started
Fool for loving after being parted
Cupid came and I got darted
I have no worth
All I was to her was mirth
Drowning in the firth
Flaming more then a hearth
Just a passing whim
My eyes grow dim
Holding on the rim
Shall I go for a swim
So dark without her light
No one was right
I tried to bring her to me height
But all I got was into a fight
Age does matter most
I'm practically a ghost
Wishing for a home on the coast
She burnt me like toast
She needed constant attention
I knew it was her condition
But I had a mission
To rid her of this false notion



Hurts

It hurts all over
Makes me wana die
Take my pain away
Put a bullet in my head
Save me from this heart ache
Just put down this poor animal
If you could feel this hurt you'd know why
Given up on life, love and the pursuit of happiness
Why did I even try
What's the fucking point
All I ever do is screw things up
I'm a worthless waste of an existence
Should have ended long ago
I died the day my sister was taken
I've been an animated dead boy ever since
I haven't matured since I turned age fourteen

I lie all the time
Never really had a girl
Yep I'll die a virgin and alone
I lie cause I'm so lame nobody pays any attention
I am what I hate
I'm a faker, liar, trashy fool
Sorry if this comes as a surprise
But I gotta come clean with all this weighing on me

I guess no one wants me dead
So I'll have to take care of it myself
Time to walk to the bridge so I can "Oops" fall
To my doom & the wreck of a few girls who like me



STUPID ME

I'm stupid
I'm empty
I'm insignificant
I'm forged
I'm immaterial
I'm fake
I'm meaningless
I'm counterfeit
I'm bogus
I'm hollow
I'm corrupt
I'm deceitful
I'm false
I'm a sham
I'm unimportant
I'm idiotic
I'm pointless
I'm irrelevant
I'm untruthful
I'm brainless
I'm futile
I'm insincere
I'm a fool
I'm misleading
I'm pretender
I'm slow
I'm not real
I'm dull
I'm a liar
I'm dim
I'm worthless
I'm inconsequential
I'm a phony
I'm unintelligent
I'm dense
I'm a fraud
I'm a impostor
I'm trivial
I'm a hypocrite
I'm dishonest



Hopeless

Traveled long and far
Through seas of boiling tar
Searching for reasons
In all the seasons
Needing vindications
Not sacred revelations
For the pain within
Cast aside any sin
I can't breath
A warning you should heed
The walls are getting so close
Make me a ghost
End my suffering
Bash it with my blessing
Ill ask god to pardon you
She'll be easy to woo
It's better for all
My face like a doll
If I'm not around
I've moved to a different town
Break my neck
Got a new apartment with a fiery deck
Cut my wrist
Watch out for any blood spay mist
Bring my end
I have no ability to mend
You know you can
Never was much of a man
I hurt those I love
Magician's toy dove
Shouldn't have been born
I'll I've known it scorn
Mother choose life
Even in the world of strife
Well I choose choice
Too big a burden to hoist
I can't sleep because of it's sting
No girl will ever wear my ring
So I never sleep
Covers my reality with fog so deep
I cry from it
More then I would if I were hit
My insides are dead and decaying
It was of my own making
So my shell doesn't matter
As meaningless as pancake batter
My blood is toxic
So much poison that I'm sick
It's killing me
Ferry man come collect your fee
Bleed it out
Don't have any clout
Your just my leech
How I miss mission beach
Heal my soul before I pass
Fight a stupid war for gas
So I can have a little peace
have my head with axle grease
I'll see you in the next body
Hope its not gaudy



Wings

I've tried to live the life given to me
Can't find the door to happiness
Even if I could, I wouldn't have a key
If only I was fearless

I hide in ordinary sight
So much fear my wits are crippled
Feel my face is a terrible blight
A few mistakes have rippled

Now nothing is left to save
Should I end it tonight
What happened to the land of the brave
I don't have the right

Where is my favorite blade
My thick skin isn't as tough as you'd think
No reason I should have been made
Too long I've survived on the brink

Time to end
Spill all my blood onto the floor
For a heart that will not mend
I'm dead to the core

Watch my body from above
Must be close to death now
Floating up out of my body like a black dove
So ugly I could be a fucking cow

Even the beauty of red stains
Can't help my looks
No one really feels my dreadful pains
I've spent half my life in books



Careless

I stood on the brink
But something held me back
Went to take another stiff drink
To make up for what I lack
I wished only to sink
Suicide was simply a knack
For someone with so many kinks
This trip there was no need to pack
It was her holding me
Preventing my demise
She brought me to me knees
Showed me my real size
Was she in possession of a key
To lift me up on high
Or to cross the narrow sea
Little did I know I would have to vie
I took comfort in this bond
Loyal as the family dog
Of her, I had grown quite fond
She covered my senses in a fog
Calming me like a windless pond
Compared to me I seemed the hog
Should have known I'd be con'd
And then left to die in a bog
The flower's love was a sham
Foolish was I not to see
Then it hit me with a wham
I was not her only Bee
But I'm just a goat, not a ram
She's no better then girls with a fee
Playing an innocent little lamb
I didn't even know the he
And summer was ending
I had lost my only chance
Love was left, still pending
Why hadn't I made a stronger advance
My heart had still needed more mending
A joust had left me heartbroken with a lance
But some reason I kept up my sending
Turned down at the high school dance
And my love was unbending



Heart Attack

My pain cannot be expressed clearly
Aches so deep I want to rip my own heart out
Then she comes back to me again
I take her back knowing what she will do
For a while she loves me
But she finds another lover
And I'm left out in the cold
So frozen I lose my feelings, my body, my soul
She comes at me with anger
As heated as hell
With a mallet in handI know what is her plan is
Swinging the tool at my chest
It is buried deep inside me breaking me apart
And again, and again she hits me.
Finally she shatters the remains of the soul
Ice crystals cover the ground completely
She notices my lingering eye on the ground
Say tells me I was to blame for my demise
And crushes the eye under her boots, then turns to leave



Shattered Mirrors

I see my image reflected in the mirror
What to me is more dearer?
Can you recognize my face
Through the guns sites of a fighter ace
Something needed but is not there
Such a weight I feel too much I fear to bear
Pale blue eyes betray my failure
I have a chance to really live but I need a cure
It shows my flaws to all that can see
Take a bat and smash to bits my knee
Can it be fixed what I didn't learn on my own
God is only one to know



Falling From Grace

This summers at an end
Do you have a coat to lend
Getting colder is the trend
Have the darkest days ahead to fend
Push a button, maybe it'll send
Sot stubborn & unwilling to bend
Leaves fall to the ground like rain
Clean them up or you'll get a nasty stain
Close yourself to the coming winter's pain
Meet a boy with the name Zain
Don't fall for that girl Jane
The chill is coming, Father Winter Ordains
Make way for that stupid turkey day
It's the opposite of May
Ice starts to clog the northern bay
Very soon you'll lose you feeling of gay
Because summer refuses to stay
See there goes the last summertime ray
So grey & weary, think I need a cane
Clouds hide the moon's wax & wane
Cloak yourself with a scarf of lion's mane
Windy are the nights, blight & bane
Confused & lost in the season's change is insane
Hate my coat, & winter clothing does that make me vain



The World

So sick of the world we're in,
everyday I live is pushing tin.
Wanting to be sprung from hell,
unwilling to accept heaven's bail.
Spinning toward the abyss
don't tell but I miss my sis.
We'll see the apocalypse today,
wouldn't it be funny if I were gay.
Where's my imaginary friend at,
he's kinda mean & crazy with perfect lats.
I need an refill of hope, please,
maybe a girl, so long as she's not a sleaze.
I got a kidney stone inside me,
damn that's a bitch, so hard to pee.
Have mental issues too, I'm clinical,
so fucked up I could be clerical.
What the hell is depression anyway,
we all have sins we need to pay.
They say find god, or get help, Freak,
I just nod, shy away like the meek.



People Suck

Why is everybody thinkn that they know,
what it's like to be me, I don't like your tone,
I can't call cause I hate using phones,
you bring up god and I just moan,
not this again, throw a dog a bone,
and I was just about to hit the zone,
go ahead and throw the first stone,
it's not like they'll see, I'm alone.
Whatever happened to the hope,
the idiots look to that nazi pope,
I'd do it but I'm not on dope,
I bet your favorite color ain't taupe,
(somtimes)I wana die hanging from a rope,
someone forgot to teach me to cope,
we could stay up and make soap,
I'd get better, but then what to write, nope.



Aye

Every night I stare into the sky
Wishing only for god to let me die
If only I could hear her lie
Love her to you on high
Bleed me from the eye
Me &death go together like ham & rye
I'd hang from a noose if I knew how to tie
Cursed by a constant urge to question why
Pacifists don't ever vie
Bake me a god damn pie
Went to a bridge so I could learn to fly
I should end this, "sigh"



Plastic Painkiller (poem that turned into a song of sorts.)

I reach out for you
To hold your heart in my hands
Steel my breath from me
With all your advances
Make me believe there is no other
Blind my eyes to everyone else
Two hearts entwined as one
Release a heavy burden from my soul

Show this invisible man to love
Be his personal painkiller
Never to be cast aside for another
Own him as he owns you for all to see

But there's trouble in paradise
Not all is what it seems to be
The boy's got a problem, the girl is scared
Rifts & cracks begin to form ever so slowly
Makes them second guess each others love
Tears stream their faces
How'd it come to this?
Boy leaves to go die, girl begs him just to stay

Show this scarred girl to love
Be her emotional plastic surgeon
Never again to be broken like a shattered mirror
Own her as she owns you for all to see

Both are alone now with their demons
Hurting inside so deep no one can truly see
He runs tell his lungs want to burst
She purges so a new love will find her
Two hearts are no longer one
They take different paths that pull them further apart
Man needs to find a way to die, woman so tired all she does is cry
We all get broken by love



Point of no Return
(feed up with the deplorable shelter system)

Bend me, I won't break
Take everything i can't be
Giving me nothing in return
Heart swells as if to burst
Fill my lungs with toxic smoke
Make me wait in the cold wind
Can't think clearly, foggy from all the pain
Reminise about my suicidal days
Oh, if only I had finished the job
Totally insane from too much stress
Hope doesn't help in this place
Only thoughts of how to survive tell tomarrow
When will my heart beat again
It has apparently stopped in its rhythm
Clinically dead the fucking world
I don't speak all that much
No one will notice if I were dead
Can't stand their voices in my ears
Wish I could silence the world
Snuff it out in one fell swoop
Burn it all to hell and gone
Maybe the heat will un-numb my senses
Bringing me back to this realm
Only to die again a real death from scorched flesh.



Vampiric
(anger towards like the people that look down on my situation)

I love what I am
You really don't give a dam
I hate to share what I can do
Think I only do it to make girls woo?
Then you'd be surprized to know I like boys too.

I Hate what you are
You hand too much in that stupid bar
So you think being mundaine is cool.?
Try being like me, and I'll drown you in a pool
God back to your perfect life you fucking tool.



Vagabond Life
(About living homelessly)

Cursed are these sleepless night
Have you clues to the homeless' plights
So cold we'll all turn to wrights
What has god dont to the lights?
Who will the reaper set in this sights?
Taken to riding the wind via kites
Nothing to be done with no civilian rights
Everyday and everynight eruption of the fights
Longing for the days of wigs, pomp, and tights
When its impolite just for someone to openly bites
In those days, armies really showed their mights
Horrible were the sacraficial human rites
No will help me reach any hrights
I'm stuck below the ground in catacomb sites



Waiting
(Getting back on my happy pills)

Waiting to be seen by the shrink
The room is filled with crazys & nutjobs
Walls tell me not to drink
It's too hard to abstain when you're on the brink
One more named is called and that begins the sobs

Everyone rushes out from behind the glass
To see whats the matter with the mime
They can't realize how long I've waited this time
The Bitch at the counter does too much sass
I shouldn't publish this stupid rhyme



Speed

Life’s a game of who can run the fastest
With some of us dragging weight behind us

I wana run so fast, so fast it hurts
But I can’t, something is holding me back
As if I was weighted down with lead
So heavy the harder I pull the more it weighs

I wana run so fast, so fast my bones break
Break everything inside me, I don’t care
I have nothing of value, or to hide
So broken now I slip out of my harness

I wana run so fast, so fast my flesh burns off
Finally set free to roam without reservation
Only problem is that air burns so hot like acid
Ripping all that I am or could be from me

I wana run so fast, so fast my muscles burst
Haphazardly healed bones hold them to me
I keep going looking for that truth to set me totally free
One by one, they’re shredded from me, with shock

I wana run so fast, so fast all I am is energy
I’m moving at the speed of pre-cognition
I stop, I look back, where am I? where I fucking started…



I’m Tired

Sick of all the wasted lives
People just living for the next rush
On the edge but without any meaning
How can you go on holding on like that?

Only those that have nothing are free
Free to be the best and worst of us
Fear in the very heart of those lost
Scorched earthen remains of the last terror

That which would cripple the mundane
Barely breaks their sweat
Bring us all to the lowest commonality
The humanity is all that we possess

Sinner & saints show their true colors here
No fog of common reality to shield them
Just breaking bonds of cadaverous rage
Unleash fearless leadership up modernity

Change the world of men like the seasons
Trust in the authenticity or winter’s hell
It will bring the strongest to their knees
Delicates are washed into roughened leather

Nihilistic revolution to set us right
The apocalypse of fate it seems to me
Everything circles back to it’s beginning
Wish I had nothing more to lose



Reasoned Rhyme

Alliterated name
Make me vain
Like Lois Lane
Unattractive Dame
Slit the vein
Abel & Cain
A lion that’s tame
Eat chow mein
Fight with Jane
You’re all the same
Dried bloodstain
Isildor’s Bane
Maces Maim
Wax or wane
What a strain
Cum that came
Walk with a cane
Nothing to gain
Finger points to blame
Little is sane
So I ordain
Horse’s leg is lame
Dance for rain
See my feign
Fortune & fame
Hide the pain
Forth & main
My favorite game
Travel to Maine
Fuck with the insane



Hold on

I've been waiting so long
For someone to come into my life
The one that will make it all right

I can't hadrly go on anymore
All i have is this terrible ache in my chest
I wish i could say I gave this life my best

I cry all night for no apparent reason
Feelings & emotions run away on their own
I get all mixed up talking to people on the phone

I got more then one side to me
There's the side I show you, & the side i hide
Inside there's this thing saying, "I've already died"

Secretly i wish i had been a girl
My gender doesn't suid my personal disposition
Maybe that's just faking a woman's intuition

All I think is I'm one big mistake
When your mothers dont want you and dad ignores
You begin to think that you're personality bores

How do I rationalize being a prude & a whore?
My sex drive overwhelms me at times so much I hate it
Then pills make it disappear like proactively treated zits

I want to wear all white to a goth ball
where to you go when neither outcasts or accepted like you
Everyone hurts me but no one is made to pay their dues.


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