Life is empty without it, there is nothing to replace it with, nothing to look forward to. You look at yourself in the mirror and realize how skinny and ugly you look and it just seems like such a long road to put it all right again. You just think "screw it" and carry on with the drugs.
so I was told several cruel things earlier
I thought many of which was unnecessary and out of line
but now that I think about it its all true
I'd change if I could but its hard
and those who look down on me don't understand
I need help I know that I'm not stupid
but I'm scared
this moment when your car doesn't go fater than 112 Mph and people still passing you like 'duuuude come on dont drive so slow'
-.- i really need a better car
I have been completely obsessed with Black Butler lately <3
It's worst then my deathnote craze.
I think i'm going to cosplay as Ciel (when he was dressed as a girl). :3
That should be fun. ^-^
Im bored though, so talk to me? (x
Mood: blehh Music: COD:Black ops 2 in the background xD
it started with me just laying in bed and I had the worst deppression ever I just felt like the world was just gonna swallow me up if I got out of my bed
then I hear my mom coming up the stairs yelling my name
the floor to my room was just filled with needles and pills
and I was desperatly trying to hide my addiction from her
but she didnt come through the door instead these two guys in those yellow hazard suits come in and take me away
next thing I know I'm in an alley with a cousin I havnt seen in a while and he stabs this needle with somthing green into my leg and I actually felt the pain it actually hurt and when he injects it I completly stop breathing and my head was just a mess of wierd feelings and emotion and I wake up tripping out and still feeling the effects I was in the dream
it was really weird and scary..
My life is finally starting to get fun. Being 21 is amazing. I wish I could stay this age forever. I love my family and friends. My band heads out for a week or touring soon. I'm psyched about it. Can't wait to hit the road and see some new faces.
<3
