have you ever been in somones arms
you'll feel their warmth envelope you
you feel safe and secure
like nothing can hurt you
for a moment it feels like everything is right in your life
nothing bothers you nothing saddens you
it all gets pushed away from your head
you feel truly happy
but then it all fades away
the high comes down
your left with just a reminder of what happiness fells like
you want to feel it again so you keep injecting
it gets to the point where when something upset you
you think about the happiness you felt while high compared to what you feel now
and instead of dealing with your problems you run
it takes over your life
and now it doesn't make you happy anymore
I don't get high from it anymore I just take it to feel normal now
that's what the needle does to you
I can go on all day on why I did what I did
but to a junkie anything is justifiable
its all excuses
Life is empty without it, there is nothing to replace it with, nothing to look forward to. You look at yourself in the mirror and realize how skinny and ugly you look and it just seems like such a long road to put it all right again. You just think "screw it" and carry on with the drugs.
so I was told several cruel things earlier
I thought many of which was unnecessary and out of line
but now that I think about it its all true
I'd change if I could but its hard
and those who look down on me don't understand
I need help I know that I'm not stupid
but I'm scared
it started with me just laying in bed and I had the worst deppression ever I just felt like the world was just gonna swallow me up if I got out of my bed
then I hear my mom coming up the stairs yelling my name
the floor to my room was just filled with needles and pills
and I was desperatly trying to hide my addiction from her
but she didnt come through the door instead these two guys in those yellow hazard suits come in and take me away
next thing I know I'm in an alley with a cousin I havnt seen in a while and he stabs this needle with somthing green into my leg and I actually felt the pain it actually hurt and when he injects it I completly stop breathing and my head was just a mess of wierd feelings and emotion and I wake up tripping out and still feeling the effects I was in the dream
it was really weird and scary..
