People ask me why am I so miserable? Why am I so angry? Why am I so alone? You people misunderstand a negative attitude for a realistic one. Just because I'm not happy go lucky doesnt make me misserable. I choose to remain alone and even those I care about never will know who I am and will never understand because I choose to keep it that way. When you rely on others for happiness you are putting yourselves at an unnecessary risk. Sure I may no be happy but I'm not misserable. I am content with how I live and how my future will look. I don't rely on others to do for me what I can and should do my self. I do enjoy the company of others once in a while. But my future and my stability does not fall on there shoulders it falls on mine. The problem with relationships these days is people always rely on someone els to hold them up and are shocked when that person fails. I am not perfect, but who is? If you want some key advice to dating take mine. Don't trust someone els to hold you up that is your responsibility. It's ok to love and care for one another but your whole world shouldn't revolve around them. Your world shouldn't start and end with them. If you can't hold your self up and be strong then you shouldn't be dating, you should be finding the strength to do it your self instead of hoping someone els will do it for you. People these days make me sick especially my generation. In school I see kids my age wasting there time I'm stupid petty relationships thinking that's what life is about and thinking it will last, and when it doesn't they whine and bitch hoping someone will make it better. You pathetic children need to grow up sure dating is fine but when your 16, 17 years old you have more important things to do than date there will be time for that later.
Every day I here people brag about being a bitch, or a moster, or an asshole or something "bad" that they take pride in. Just because you think about killing doesn't make you a monster everyone has done it atleast once. I am not proud of alot of things I have done and these horrible deeds make me who I am, but you people claiming to be mosters or bad people are a joke. You no nothing of pure evil because if you did you wouldn't brag about it like its something to be proud of. You think your so badass but if it ever came down to it I will show you fear and ill show you what a real monster looks like.
People can't take a hint. Just because I talk to you doesn't mean I like you or care hell it doesn't even mean I'm paying attention. All it means is I'm bored and I am killing time. I am not a nice person really. I don't wanna be your friend, boyfriend, BFF, or what ever. All I'm here for is to kill time. That doesn't mean ill purposely be a dick for no reason (unless I feel like screwing with people in which case I will) but I'm not here to be your pale or give a shit about you. I rant about my ideals and shit not because I care what you think but because I feel like it. Weather you love me, hate me, agree, or disagree, with me at the end of the day you still are just another person on the Internet that I don't care about and if you don't like me block me or delete me or ignore me either way I don't care.
What a week! Last week was such a rollercoaster ride. I really haven’t had a chance to catch my breath til now. At work it was mostly deep shit, of the highest degree – but on wednesday, as we warmed up for Antimatter and Vic Anselmo in Semifinal, Helsinki, I witnessed something utterly breath-taking, that really got my spirits up! Vic Anselmo played with my Nord Electro for her own solo-show plus the Antimatter show, and I must say that I really haven’t seen or heard anyone play the instrument so beautifully. It was magic.
We started the evening quite early with our 30-minute acoustic show, and it went quite well, considering the amount of rehearsing. Some songs worked outstandingly well as acoustic numbers, but a few songs still need some re-arranging. Well, they didn’t sound too bad, but we all noticed that without the rhythmic base from the drums, the songs seemed to just wander about, without ever reaching the dynamic climax. And It Remains, on the other hand, with its’ new acoustic arrangement worked really well. I decided to play slightly distorted bluesy organ in the chorus, and it instantly took the song into the Pink Floyd-department. And it was great! The closing, new song in our set was the new rough arrangement of a song called Days To Come, and it also worked quite magically well as an acoustic piece.
Then, after a short breather, Vic Anselmo took the stage and played her solo material, just singing and playing piano. And let me tell you: it was pretty fucking epic show! She played and sang with such a talent, I think my jaw dropped open. It was simply amazing. After the gig I had to buy her cd – signed by her, of course!
Finally Antimatter got on the stage: Mick Moss on acoustic guitar and Vic Anselmo on piano and backing vocals. The show started with a cover of a legendary Richie Havens number, an old negro spiritual Sometimes I Feel Like A Motherless Child, in honour of this great musician who just passed away the day before, on April 23rd 2013. As Mick was playing this song in the soundcheck, I knew I had heard it before, but I just couldn’t figure out whose song it was. Not until he announced it later that night. Richie Havens, of course! I think Havens didn’t actually write the song, but he made it famous with his Woodstock performance in 1969. Originally Richie Havens was supposed to be the 5th artist on this legendary festival, but due to the fact that all the four other bands and artists were running late, Richie was to open the whole festival. He played for 2 hours and 45 minutes (!) - the audience demanded an encore after another, and when he came back to the stage, having played every song he knew, he played his own interpretation of this old spiritual song. When I first saw the Woodstock documentary with some live footage of each artist, this song really made a huge impact on me. Havens’ performance was so emotional, so spiritual. What a way to open the festival! And what a song to open a gig with! Antimatter really served justice to the song. It gave me the chills. Like the whole show.
I have to be honest and confess, that I’m not very familiar with Antimatter’s material. Of course, I have checked out some of the songs, but I didn’t really recognize any when they played - maybe the setlist was mostly newer songs that I hadn't heard, dunno. I really recognized only one other song, another cover. This time it was The Power of Love by Frankie Goes To Hollywood – one of my favorites from this notorious 80’s synth-pop band. I had the double vinyl back in the day, and I remember that this song was the opening song of one the sides. I used to listen to it, time and time again…you know, in the age of vinyls you had to pick up the needle and place it back on the first groove. It was almost as a ritual of a kind. I think I will have to get that album back in cd-format. I haven’t really listened to it in years. Nevertheless, the Antimatter originals all sounded awesome. I think I oughta get the whole back-catalogue! Mick Moss has such a deep and evocative voice!
When Antimatter comes to Finland the next time, I will be there! If not warming up for, then at least in the audience.
So I recently lost my uncle.I used to be much closer to him than I was before he passed. But one thing that hit me was that he was a heavy smoker. And that was not where I wanted to end up, being a pack/pack and a half a day smoker. So I decided I would quit, but I knew I wasn't going to try patches or just stopping. So I bought an electronic cigarette my friend recommended. And I love it. I have spent more money than I am comfortable sharing on each product, but I have never felt better about myself. I am now over two months smoke free, and i hate to sound preachy, but I want to recommend to all smokers to try and make the switch. There are so many options and it is much better for you. I'll step off my soap box now. Thank you.
Ok if your one of those stupid people that considers garbage such as BVB, botdf, sleeping with sirens, nicki manaj, JB, or lil Wayne inspirational you are retarded. I'm not saying all of the shit I listen to is superior but I have a wide variety of taste in music and can appreciate real artistic talent. What I just named off is just horrible excuse for music. Hell I don't even consider any of that shit music it's garbage. It's sad that its actually some how considered popular fuck is wrong with you people.
What is up with all these random chicks messaging me am hitting on me lately it's fuckin annoying. Unless I message you I don't wanna talk, I only message you people when I have nothin better to do. I don't want a girlfriend so leave me the fuck alone you bitches are mad annoying.