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xXxtrappedsoulxXx's Journal
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Proud new Parent!!!!!!!
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August 13, 2008, 04:16:pm
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Well it's time to let you all know...
I had my beautiful baby boy!!!!! He was born 8/6/08!
His name is Adrien James Lotus. He has two middle names because of me and my mom trying to figure out a middle name for him.
He is the most precious thing!!!! I love him with all my heart and would die for him!
I am not going to put him up for adoption after all. I couldn't do that to him. He is so beautiful and such a wonder to have around. I may be tired and still in pain, but it's all worth it in the end!!!!!
But I thought I would let you all know I had my baby!!! He's a healthy wonderful and beautiful thing!!!!!!
Peace.
Mood: happy
Music: Twiztid - Wrong with me
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Baby oh Baby
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August 04, 2008, 01:29:am
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Well my dark friends, I am posting this to let you know that lil Adrien Lotus should be on his way at any moment. I went into labor today, but it was "false" labor...but they said that it's possible that I might end up back in the hospital.
I am so nervous, scared, and excited. I am having really bad contractions, but there isn't anything they can do at this moment. I am wondering if and when my water is ganna break.
But I thought I would let ya'll know.
Peace and Love.
Mood: Scared
Music: Insane Clown Posse - Homies
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The Great Debate..
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July 23, 2008, 03:39:pm
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Well I have been sitting here at home, debating, and thinking about a lot of things lately. So much has been going on since I left Job Corps, and I just don't know what to do anymore.
I am glad I have my friends behind me a hundred percent. That really lets me know who my true friends are. Yet, I have this feeling they just don't want to hear any shit that I have to say anymore. I feel like I am out in the dark.
A lot is going on with the pregnancy, specially since shit happened with me and Colton, and he isn't happy at all with the decisions I make. But I want to point this one out.....Why have a family adopt the baby that lives in Lincoln, when in the first place I didn't really want to decide on them. I mean they are wonderful people, and very caring...but Colton doesn't seem to want to take the initiative to be a father to Adrien Lotus. So much has been on my mind since the day I found out that I was pregnant. I am so scared of what is to come, but I know that he will be in a really nice home here in Fremont.
The other thing that has irked me off lately is the fact that Colton decides to call everyone I know Crackheads & other shit like that....Well I wish he understood one thing....He knows these people as well. So Colton what the hell are you thinking? And him yelling at me saying my mom is a bitch, and my family is shit....well there is something else that needs to be pointed out, I have never once called him mom anything. I don't understand why he can do that to my mom, when all I have been is nothing but nice to his family. He may think otherwise, and that is only because he just won't think.
I want him to be the daddy so much, but he don't want to show any initiative for it. I have gone through my almost 9 months of pregnancy alone, with the exception of my family and friends....I thank them greatly for being there for me, but with him...he hasn't done anything to help, all he does is ridicule me, and hurt me. I thought at one point when we were together that, all would be good...but good things never last.
No relationship that I have ever been in seems to go as good as I want it, usually it ends up on the other side of the fence.
I also sit here and wonder what happened to me and T.J. Yes I understand I shouldn't think about that shit, because it was all a basic piece of shit time waster relationship, but all I can do is think of what I did wrong...if I did anything wrong. I still have no answers, and wont.
Some days when I sit here, I wonder if I should just cut myself off from the world for awhile and take time to reflect on things that I have done wrong. I love my family & friends so much...but I really have been debating that so much.
Honestly I don't know what else to do....like I said earlier, I know my friends & family are there for me when I need them...but there are times when I wonder if they are tired of hearing me talk.
I will never know.
Mood: Upset
Music: Static-X - Cold
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WOOO
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July 08, 2008, 07:42:am
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Today's my birthday!
I am 20!
So very happy!
only 1 month to go till the baby is born!!! 
So yup!
Bye
Mood: WOOO MOOD
Music: Bullet for my Valentine - Waking the Demon
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6 months
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May 12, 2008, 03:27:pm
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Well I am 6 months pregnant, & my boyfriend broke up with me not to long ago.
He is such a Jackass, but what can I do?
I can't wait to go home to Fremont! I miss everyone!!!
So yea I have noticed lately, that I haven't been online much, or barely at all. I am sorry for the inconvienience of that, I am still at Job Corps. But I will have my GED soon.
Only 3 more months to go till I have the baby, and the baby is a. . . BOY!!!!!!!!!
That is one thing I am very happy about. I really wanted a boy & I am going to have one!!!!
Hope everyone is having a good day, and hopefully your week is great!
Miss everyone, and love you all!!!
MUCHO LOVE,
Quinn
Mood: Sick
Music: HIM - Heartache every moment
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