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the_banshees_lament's Journal
Ember's Journal
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I want to fly
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May 19, 2008, 06:37:pm
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"I was looking for a pair of wings," she said, taking out her knife, "much like yours."
But as the blood poured down, heavy and dark, she found herself horrified.
Not by the blood, or the boy left crying, but at the emptiness she still felt, even after all this.
So she stood, looking at her reflection as the creeping fluid darkness climbed her skirt,
like capillaies, thread to thread, until it touched her skin.
A blue like a royal symbol, stiched in veins across the back
A ray of light streams through cooled cob webs, making the black air all that much blacker.
A body lies in a warm jumble on the floor, the human that was god,
perfect for that one moment when you feel the beat of your heart and the air in your lungs,
the one second of blaring clarity in which you knew you were alive -
which was the most you can ever expect from perfection.
But the fight to keep breathing goes on and on because in your mind you want to be dead.
Because only in death do we realize that people would miss us.
Only in death do we stop to rush of panic
the urgency of purpose
the pain of living.
The blue is searing through and becomes
the only light.
But I want to fly.
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random quizzes
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May 15, 2008, 11:58:pm
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I was looking through a site taht I enjoy very much, and I decided to finaly take the quizzes that it offers.
Here are the results of the ones that I took
 I took the "if you were a ghost" quiz on gURL.com |  |
 | my ghost is a
shadow person
Are you a private person? Someone that people would consider shy or quiet? If so, then your phantom friend might be a shadow person.
A shadow person is one of those introverted spirits--the type you catch from the corner of your eye. Like this spectre, you probably tend to shy away from the spotlight. Instead, you thrive when you're on the side, where you can deal privately with matters. For example, you might contribute a great deal to the group project, but when it comes presenting it in front of class, you'd rather die or be invisible.
In the end, most shadow people disappear before anyone can see them. We hope that's not the case with you (hypothetically speaking), 'cause we think you might have a lot to say...and you may be surprised at how many people want to listen.
What kind of ghost are you? |
 I took the "Chinese Elements" quiz on gURL.com |
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I am...
Water
Your dominant element is water. The ancient Yin-Yang scholars saw water types as people who usually didn't mind spending a little time by themselves. Do some people think you brood too much or are a bit of a loner? It may be that you just happen to enjoy your own company. Honesty probably means a lot to you--if there's one thing water types can't stand, it's people who tell lies, even "little" white lies. Do you love the beach, the pool or even just hot baths? Water types are happiest near water.
Water has no defined shape and is related to a strong sense of imagination that defies set boundaries.
Calmness is the dominant elemental energy of water and this helps us to make decisions that are smart and well-considered.
Water can stand still or flow. Prevailing stillness promotes peace of mind while flowing water energizes.
To enhance both the soothing and stimulating qualities, the water energy needs to be near real water. It doesn't have to be the ocean or a river--an aquarium or even floating candles in your house should be more than sufficient.
A cold climate is best for the water energy, as it prevents it from evaporating into steam. The color that corresponds to water is black. Water types like salty foods.
NOTE: Water types tend to have curvy hips and often look like they are deep in thought, even if they're not.
What chinese element are you? |
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I took the "The Nine Muses" quiz on gURL.com |
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My muse is...
Erato
Do you swoon over love poems and romance? If so, Erato, patron goddess of love poetry, may be your muse. Her name means "The Lovely," and she is often depicted with a lyre and a crown of roses. In love? Have a crush? Perhaps you should call upon Erato for inspiration to write your sweetie a love poem.
Who is your muse? |
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 I took the "what's your sixth sense?" quiz on gURL.com |  |
| my sixth sense is
clairsentient
Feeling is your sixth sense. Called clairsentient (clear feeling), your inner voice is one that touches on your empathetic nature. What does this mean? Well, you're probably the most emotional of your friends and you are very in touch with the feelings of others.
As a clairsentient, you often know something is wrong because you experience an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach (or the opposite for good things). It might be that your friend has had a bad day--but hasn't told anyone--and somehow you just know what's going on. Often this type of intuitive knowledge cannot be explained.
What's your sixth sense? |
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live and let live
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May 15, 2008, 03:54:am
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It has become a big thing lately on VF. The people who have joined and are not gothic, metalheads, or anything in the general area. Alot of people I know have a problem with this.....
Why?
For years subcultures have been discriminated aginst so why should we do the same to the mudane people. Yes it does get on my nerves when I see scene whores who think they are goth, but these people don't mess with me, so why should I hate them for no reason? Those of you who hate these people because of their looks, you are no better than those who hate you because you might wear black, or have a pink moehawk. If anything, everyone should be excited that 'normal' people are coming to VF. Its a great thing. They are coming here, experincing the gothic and industrial culture, getting rid of those hateful sterotypes that have been forged in their minds. The knowleage the get, they will take back to the real world, and quite possibly, get rid of the sterotypes there. And for all of the baby bats on this site. Don't hate them because they haven't grasped the aesthetic idea. Be friend them, teach them.
Another thing. The main idea behind the biggest subculture on here, gothic, is to have a unique mind. Why in the hell would you hate someone because they think differently?
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Dear my dear,
Gray is your color, my dear…
The eternal rest…
Ever since you left my dear, death became poetic.
As I stood on the ground you rest, death became a mystique.
Are you lonely, are you missing, with the same people there?
Is it nasty, is it bleak, with the soil, the worms accompany?
Ay, is that what you say, I hear, from, whence will you awake?
From the mud, from the dirt, from the feet above, up here the grass is green!
He with the robes that kisses, the soft ground below.
Caress, a brush with death forever, but never dead it seems.
He, the silent surveyor stands, head sculpted in prayer.
With mourning eyes that speaks to you, my dear, with gaze so hypnotic.
Sleep, he says, sleep and lie, never before such peace exists.
Rest your gaze, my child, take heed, God you have will always be.
Ground from whence produced a seed, a trunk so majestic.
Is the thinning canopy for you, my dear, for the sun’s too bright it seems.
Fear not, ‘fraid not, my shadow, my shelter, is there for you to keep.
Here I stand, cast in stone, arms slack from the years.
Head bowed to face you, my dear, to keep you down for company.
Mon ami, mon enfant, we are all but same.
You prop the ground I rest on, I keep the ground appease.
Through the screen I tried to squint, to catch a glimpse of you.
Ever since you went under me, my dear, time became eternity.
One day, I know my arms will waste, to the ground from the magpies’ chewing.
Maybe my head the next, I think, for my neck’s growing tired always.
But wouldn’t it be well, my friend, for you said you liked my eyes.
You can have them then, to keep, but let not the worms eat you,
…before my magpies did.
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so close
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May 09, 2008, 01:39:am
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I've spent so much time throwing rocks at your window
That I never even knocked on the front door
I walk by statues never even made one chip
but if i could leave a mark on the monument of the heart
I just might lay myself down for a little more than I had the last day
Wait a time to spare these lies we tell ourselves
These days have come and gone
But this time is sweeter than honey
-amy lee
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all that I'm living for
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May 09, 2008, 01:35:am
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"All That I'm Living For"
All that I'm living for,
All that I'm dying for,
All that I can't ignore alone at night.
I can feel the night beginning.
Separate me from the living.
Understanding me,
After all I've seen.
Piecing every thought together,
Find the words to make me better.
If I only knew how to pull myself apart.
All that I'm living for,
All that I'm dying for,
All that I can't ignore alone at night.
All that I'm wanted for,
Although I wanted more.
Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me.
I believe that dreams are sacred.
Take my darkest fears and play them
Like a lullaby,
Like a reason why,
Like a play of my obsessions,
Make me understand the lesson,
So I'll find myself,
So I won't be lost again.
All that I'm living for,
All that I'm dying for,
All that I can't ignore alone at night.
All that I'm wanted for,
Although I wanted more.
Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me.
Guess I thought I'd have to change the world to make you see me,
To be the one.
I could have run forever,
But how far would I have come
Without mourning your love?
All that I'm living for,
All that I'm dying for,
All that I can't ignore alone at night.
All that I'm wanted for,
Although I wanted more.
Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me.
Should it hurt to love you?
Should I feel like I do?
Should I lock the last open door,
My ghosts are gaining on me.
-amy lee
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speak
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May 06, 2008, 11:34:pm
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And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died?
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In this time remember me
I miss your hands on my skin
Don´t you remember me?
Promises and lost dreams
Two spirits come to me
My death, I could see it
Don´t control my Tristeza
give me my life, again
This sorrow is infiniteI don´t want this world
My life is illusion for me
This time brings me fear
I saw blood in the groundThese wounds don´t die
Two spirits come to me
my life was dark
That night of wintera new world was born
Don´t control my Tristeza
give me my life, again
This sorrow is infinite
I don´t want this world
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Who asks a simple question?
Who knows when who's forgiven?
Who lives a life of slumber?
Who sleeps upon the water?
I guess it's time to face your memories
Broken spirits open fears
Darksome shades combine fragility
Frigid smiles across the miles
Guilty eyes surmise asymmetry
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white dove
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April 29, 2008, 04:06:am
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White dove you don't need a spaceship
They don't know that you are not broken
You are already alive
On the other side of the galaxy
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