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my niece
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June 15, 2008, 01:58:pm
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Well, I feel much better now. I am finally able to calm down, sit and relax for a while. My sister's baby, the little Viktoria, was born on 07.06.2008. Both of them - my sis and her daughter, are alive and ok, happier than ever. I, as usual, have too much work to do - have to study for the exams on July, have to train more ( i almost don't do it because of lack of time for myself ), and of course have to go to work. But now there is a new, strange feeling... I was really worried abaout my sis - she is only 17 and I thought that she wont be able to handle with the baby. But when I looked at the eyes of the little creature, I suddenly realised that she can do it. Everybody can do it. It's a matter of love, and this little girl is just a source of love.
To be honest, I doubted that I will ever be able to feel like that - happy, somehow... full. Some strange pure joy filling me. It's a bit weird, I am usually far colder, far reasonable, rational, logical, practical... But I am happier now. Things will change soon, I'm sure. Too soon I will be again like a robot - working, training and than sleeping, and again working, and training, and sleeping, and so on. And I won't have any time to think about the way I feel. But I am sure as well that I will be a little happier and a little more responsible. And I will be always there for this little, pretty and stil innocent girl. Or at least I will do my best to be.
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