I've been absent for soooo long. Now I'm back for just a little bit. I can't sleep. My mind is going a million miles per minute. Here are my random thoughts. * I know what I want question is will I get it.. *how do I go about it. *I get what I want and I feel the same should go for you. *in a way you're already mine but you don't know this. *I wish I could just see you. *if things end as I feel they will ill just replace you. *someone is already trying to take your place, but will I let them. *I've had the worst luck when it comes to things like this. *I've always wanted what I couldn't have.
This is what I think at night. Typing it has helped so maybe ill be able to sleep soon..
Well I can't sleep. And I haven't been here for awhile now. I've actually been pretty busy with class and just other stuff. It used to be that I was just at home all day so I could be online all day. Now I'm hardly ever alone and if I am I just don't log in. Ive actually gotten to the point where I hate being alone. So far the only time I'm not with a friend is when I'm sleeping. Sure there are times where I just want to chill by myself but I usually don't do that for more than an hour.. Anyway lately I just haven't been able to sleep. No matter how hard I try I just stay awake. This is a problem because I have a final tomorrow at 8. So its going to be hard for me to get out of my bed.. Other than that I have this huge crush.. Its pretty much all I think about and I don't know what to do.. Its not that I can't talk to this person.. Cause I do we talk somewhat and I see them just about everyday or every other day. But yeah its all I think about and I'm trying to get it off my mind.. So maybe now ill be able to sleep.. Hopefully I will be able to be a little more active soon.. even if its just for a couple of days..
So this is pretty much about my best Judith Mutumbo. Without her I'd probably break down. We actually haven't really been best friends for too long. We went to the same high-school but never talked cause we never had classes together. I met Judith through esther who I had a class with my junior year and we were friends(we still are now). But because Esther moved out of the dorms me and Judith have gotten closer. I tell her everything now. Its impossible for me to keep anything from her. I just can't do it for too long. Anyway all my friends have my back but I feel closer to Judith than I do to Autumn and Yohanna. No matter what Judith has been here for me so far. I've had a few problems and Judith has given me some great advice. She lets me know when I've fucked up and made a huge mistake but she always makes me feel better about it. So I'm so happy to have such a great person like her in my life right now and I hope to never ever lose her. I would honestly break down without her here.
Anyway that's all people bye <3 (I'm going to try to sleep even though I may not be able to due to my suitemates) Mood: calm.
So I today I had to come home in order to watch my cousin while my aunt went somewhere for her birthday. I'm super bored right now with nothing to do. So I guess this is a great time to do this. I honestly have not been alone as much as I was in the past. I used to log on everyday, but now I may log in only once a week, but hey that's life right. So what have I been up to? I've just been going to class, and hanging with friends. Just about every night I hang out with Autumn, Judith, and Yohana sometimes Esther if she's on campus at night and Roger if he's willing to come outside. We usually sit outside in this courtyard near the dorms. I think most people know us as the girls that are always outside. Those are the people I'm always with. If you see one of them then it's likely you will see me. Anyway I've met some great people and a couple of not so great people. Well not a lot really maybe just one person. Who just needs to get there shit together. And the thing with this person is we met them like once and then it was like someone was always bringing them up or saying their name. I don't know if that has ever happened to you or if you know what I'm talking about, but yeah it's like you can't get rid of them. I mean there's a little bit more to this story but if you read this and want more information then you could always message me.. On a different note I think I'm gaining weight which isn't too good. I'm so tired of eating in the dining hall its the same food everyday. I want to go see my mommy so I can get some real food.. Instead of hamburgers, hotdogs, that burnt pizza that they pretend isn't burnt up until you turn it over and look at the bottom, the Asian station that never gives you enough chicken with your rice and vegetables, and that entree station that I never touch most of the time. But yeah I need something different. Oh well I guess this is all so bye bye. <3 Mood: Bored Music: Waiting- Breathe Carolina
I shouldn't care,but I do. I'm trying my hardest not too. I don't even know you that well,but I'm worried about you. I want you to prove me wrong. Show me you're not who I think you are. I've heard that if you say out loud what you want it will happen while if you say what you don't want to happen it will. I think that's like the law of attraction or something. I've heard it from mod sun. So its going to be okay and we will still talk. You're not the person she thinks you are, and I want to believe what you've said. Prove me wrong and show me that I can..
Oh well I couldn't sleep and this is what's in my brain. I'm going to sleep now I guess.. Bye my loves. Mood: shitty..
