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XxlyssaroseXx's Journal

The Life Of Me

June 04, 2012, 05:04:am

The kitchen rug,
omitting the untraceable odor,
the sickly smell of mold mixed with smoke,
or rancid meat mixed with orange juice.
Tired feet trudging
grinding in it further,
into the carpet,
into the floor,
which moans the horrid sound of its walls,
pushing down, slanting inward.
The thin black film
layering everything with dirt.
Scrubbing hard,
but never coming clean.
Within these walls of despair,
without the pleasure of dying,
within these walls of despair,
only bowing our heads in obedience,
our silent vow is to never leave.

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June 04, 2012, 05:00:am

You will never understand
How my heart for you doesn't fade.
oh, how I wish to hold your hand,
but I've been led to be afraid.

Why must everything came with pain
when I search for nothing of this?
It all ends with tears in vain
as I suffer to turn my face from what reality is;

And yet you still remain confused,
as if my feelings have blinded you.
And yet I still remain bruised,
as I allow myself to;

But maybe one day you will see my love for you
and maybe one day you'll feel the pain as I did.
Now I'm left confused of what to do,
hoping the pain in my lonely soul will rid.

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June 04, 2012, 04:56:am

Flipping through the diary of my mind
Re-reading old days and nights
Thinking of last life's loves and loneliness
Feeling yesterday again today
As coldness reacquaints itself
I'm in that place
That place that grabs you and holds you tight
Prevented from turning
Into tomorrow's thawed pages.

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June 04, 2012, 04:53:am

How many miles must I travel before your
name stops falling so easily from my
blasphemous tongue, before your face
becomes just a faded memory and your eyes
cease to haunt my every dream, oh this
endless night, a meek mockery of my former
self. The tears fall gracelessly down my
already pale cheeks, burning, scorching
like liquid fire as they descend, my eyes
glaze over, lifeless, hollow pits ravaged
by the lack of the sun and lacking the
flames that once danced in the umber
depths. That fierce blaze that once
survived a tornado was blown out in a
single breath, replaced with unending cold.
the soft drawl of your voice that once
warmed my body now tuned my soul to ice, a
frozen reality of unending misery. Lies
were my truth, now my torment, so I stay in
the dark, my punishment.

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