I wonder what life would be like If I had never met my best friend in the whole world. Would I be hurting as badly as I am now? I would very much like to know.... he knew.... me..... better than any one.... and I know.... him so well.... but now I don't know him at all.... :'( wish I wouldn't think about what he told me that day.... that one day.... when I asked him something.... now that he has broken his promise..... I have no idea where to turn.... he was the only person besides a select few that I ever trusted.... I would let him have my life in his hands if there was no other choice... I'd want him to be the one to pull the trigger..... or the plug..... because I trust him..... I trusted him..... :'( Mood: crying Music: lets pretend (start over again)- d.s.o.t.o
Just a few days ago.... my best friend left my side.... I still haven't stopped crying.... I wish he'd come back..... Mood: depressed Music: lets pretend (start over again)- d.s.o.t.o
I am worthless.... when it comes to u.... so unworthy..... Yesterday my dog was confirmed as stolen and u are the only person I could turn to for comfort. Today my other dog Roxy came from Mexico and is now living with us. I turned to you for love yet I feel so worthless.... I love you.... Mood: criminal Music: cry bleed scratch repeat- d.s.o.t.o
Edwin.... idk if u even read these but.... I need to talk to u.... if u go to band practice this week.... I'd appreciate it if we can talk.... just talk.... about..... what happened to the baby..... please I need you to hear me out on it.... I've tried so many times to tell you.... that's how you broke my heart.... you did the worst possible thing to me and I tried to avoid you because i was afraid I was going to shatter in front of u :'( I know I will if I do this..... but I need you to know... it is eating away at me.... you not knowing what happened to the baby.... I don't even know if you know.... it will give me peace if you knew... I'm hurting so bad now.. . Please just try and come.... it will give me peace once you know.... Mood: lost Music: lost forever you-d.s.o.t.o
I'm giving up this fight I don't want the hurt anymore I'm giving up. I'm not gunna let any doctor help me I'm going to ask them to let me die.... I can't ... hold on anymore I just want this to take me.... "consume me bitch I ain't scared!" This is all that is going threw my head now... Mood: cancercide Music: cancercide-d.s.o.t.o
