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Lillian_Prewett's Journal
Lillian's Ramblings
The odds and ends of my mind, and how my day is.
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I got shitfaced.
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August 11, 2008, 05:37:pm
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So I drank almost a whole bottle of some unknown booze. And I was standing on the couch, shouting at the ceiling and everyone was laughing.
I had to get a piggy back ride from Andy, who said that I was convinced he was a horse and we were in a championship race. I kept on saying 'Come on Dobbin.'
So after a while he started whinnying and neighing like a horse as he took me home.
Good times.
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One day.
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August 10, 2008, 01:15:pm
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One day you're going to think about the pain that you put me through.
I'm sick of being used and neglected and abused and hurt and just being the walking matt for the people I love.
It's not fucking fair to hurt me like this. All I do is help you.
I need to stop being so goddamn nice.
Mood: Angry.
Music: I was walking with a ghost by Tegan and Sara
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I will admit.
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August 05, 2008, 04:45:pm
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That a lot of bad things have happened to me in the last six months. Attempts of killing myself, more self abuse and signing up for therapy.
But then I think about what really has beena good thing. And I find the best silver lining in the whole wide world.
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Back on top.
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July 29, 2008, 12:09:pm
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I listen to the cure so much it's not funny, but who can blame me?
The cure fucking rocks!
....
yeah that's pretty much all I have to say.
:]
Mood: Cheery.
Music: Lovecats by The Cure
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It always happens.
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July 27, 2008, 05:10:pm
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When he's gone, I become a wreck. And I take it out on myself. And then he comes back and finds what I did to myself and then he gets really sad because he acts like it's all his fault.
i don't want him to feel that way. It is my fault, not his.
a vacant calm always comes when I cut.
I'm seeing my shrink in a few days.
he's going to want to see my wrists when I tell him about this weekend.
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