Though i may have given up. Still you linger behind my eyes. I wish to keep lying to myself. It will always be this bind. Blind and not knowing the way. And would you look away even though i couldn't return your stare? I may have given up but something inside is still feeling that this nothing that is. it once was a bit more before stupidly sent you packing.
No regrets no regrets.
I've never regretted anything more.
Ignore this, please These words were never meant for you to know. read listen, and please forget.
Im not good enough for anything but memory just from you to me.
Do these eyes see nothing but dreams of you left behind, blind. Mood: BLAH
and maybe sometimes i wish to forget where my path leads, pretend i wont end up begging change in the streets. Pretend i'm competant or complacent or whichever series of words would mean my head is on right. And maybe sometimes i like to forget all the pain. Pretend i'm not still dreaming, Pretend my dreams aren't all nightmares. And maybe sometimes i wish someone would save me. Pretend there is someone who cares, Pretend there's more to someone who, isn't there. And maybe sometimes I just want to be different, Pretend to wear someone elses shoes, Pretend there was more about life i could choose. And maybe sometimes i'd just rather give up, Pretend my life is worth living for. Pretend i'm not still holding a knife. And maybe sometimes i can erase the disease, Pretend life will always be fine. Pretend the blood that's pooling now isn't mine. And maybe sometimes there is more than just words to what i write. Pretend for a moment i have talent. Pretend for a moment i'll wake up tommarrow.
I've watched your tired wings crack, The bead of sweat drip down your back, The coldest tears run down your cheek, I've seen even the darkest parts of you.
And now your just memory, Memory to be erased, To slowly disintegrate.
I've seen the worn out look in your eyes, The way your back bends from the stress, The sorry way you look at me when you know its too late. The last smile youd offer my way.
And now in your absence, Do i find clarity and withheld, i find it burdensome to continue to dream of you.
I've seen what you look like when you've given up. I've seen you dive right back down and blame it on insecurities, instabilities. And my last rational thought would be.
Erasing your disease. Erasing your memory. Erasing every trace of you from me.
And for the first time in years I'll finally be clean.
the more i make contact with the alien, the more i realize i am less and less myself. The more i glance the more i see the dullness overtaking the strangers face, we move the same. touch the same cold glass only opposite. I can no longer feel the sting nor meet the cruel eyes reflected. Is there something wrong with me? somedays i feel i am simply the alien and the real me is looking back.
