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DR490N's Journal
Indwellings.
Thoughts, musings, hateful messages, random shit, and ramblings of everyone's least-favorite Draconic Psi/Sang vampire.
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Haven't made an entry since before the summer
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September 21, 2008, 02:08:am
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So here the fuck I am in all of my awesomeness.
This will be a big entry, so grab a pot of coffee and brace yourself.
Well, it's been a bit of a rough summer. My mother got some knee surgery, and thus seems to make every possible attempt since to make the healing process more hard on herself, and thus on me. I spent much of my summer all over the place and back and forth from downtown. I'm still looking for some temporary, full time employment(for a couple years of steady cash inflow), but the London job market is complete shit, probably in part due to the steadily growing housing market and the steady inflow of residents, and perhaps in part due to the eyesores of metal, pastel painted ugly peice of fucking shit trees downtown.
But enough whining.
I've been at a local organization called "Youth Opportunities Unlimited" for the past couple weeks picking up some extra job skills. I'm pleasantly surprised how beneficial it's been, and how much I rather like my instructors. I've also had the opportunity to recieve some great training that should help me get a crap job for a bit. As long as I have money to be able to move out and split rent with a couple friends, I'll be happy. I can't take the intolerable bitch-ness of my mother(again with my whining. I think I need a kick to the gut). Seana got a new camera, which pretty much takes alot of awesome pictures. I got a haircut(friends and recent visitors will have noticed that I now have shorter, more stylable hair), and Seana introduced me to Picnik, which I rather like. Seana has taken some pretty great pictures of me with that new camera, which picnik has enabled me to create EPIC WIN out of. Also, we went to the western fair, where there was a HUBBARD DIANETICS booth. Silly scientologists. I walked up to a woman who was sitting down for a 'free stress test', and had a good lol when I spoke with her.
"Excuse me ma'am. Don't fall for this shit."
"Excuse me?"
"Scientology is a very dangerous cult. I just thought I would let you know."
The $cilon running the booth rolled her eyes, and the color drained out of the woman's face. I retreated and spoke with my friends. The woman spoke with the Scientologist for a moment, then got up VERY fast for the againg, slightly overweight thing she was, and booked it out of there with her husband as fast as possible. HAH! Another life saved from the insanity, personal abuse, and financial destitution of scientology. I ought to pat myself on the back.
Ramble ramble ramble.
On Friday, after I bought a nice pair of 20 eye Doc Martens(I've wanted them for like 5 years) Seana, myself, and a couple others went to a show at Pandemic, where batcave music was supposed to be played beforehand and 4 industrial bands were to play. We were, unfortunately, met with disappointment, as Pandemic showed the same lack of event organizing as last time, just with a slightly larger and better looking crowd. The soundsystem was not properly equalized to the less than satisfactory acoustics of the place(I rather hope they by the place next door when their lease is up, as it's larger, squarer, and will just be a better venue).
There was a lack of batcave, which was disappointing, and it seems one of the bands bailed at the last minute(Eliminate The Body), which may have accounted for some of the lack of organization. We sat around, talked, met some people, and Discovered that a new friend of ours, Nigel, happens to be a hell of a ladies' man, despite being slightly more geeky than most of the rest of us(except steve) and having a speech impediment that makes him sound kind of like someone from Brooklyn(good on ya Nigel. You fucking rock).
Seana got a picture with a great looking chick, who apparently was in one of the bands playing. The first band, just as the show we attempted last summer, happened to start rather late. They sucked, rather hard, a two peice group called Orphan Grinder. no stage presence, bad equalizing, and generally boring songs that lacked any professional polish made us not really give a shit.
after this was a brief period in which it took too long to set up for the next act, an all girl group called Alectona, who did alright. they would have souded alot better if the sound guy knew what the fuck he was doing(if he happens across this, no offense, I'm just overcritical, not to mention a prick). However, they did a pretty good cover of The Bauhaus' Bela Luguosi's Dead, which, though not one of my favorite Bauhaus songs, was well covered and more or less made my night.
We then went outside for a bit, grabbed some piza from an asian owned pizza place next door(which was damn good pizza), and decided to call it a night, as everyone but me was tired, and Steve was cranky because he hadn't heard any actual industrial all night. I wish we stayed, as the blue haired girl that my lovely girlfriend got her picture taken with happened to be in DYM, and they fucking kick ass, so we missed their set.
Folks at Pandemic, please get your shit together. We need a decent goth/industrial/whatthefuckever venue here, and the place has a great atmosphere, just shitty organization.
We ended up crashing at a friend's place, and then acted like jackasses until 4 in the morning, everyone went their separate ways at separate times today, and I woke up around 1, then played Rock Band 2 until like 8 or 9, then went to Seana's and now here. So it's 2 AM now, and I'm still awesome.
Anywho, butthurt aside, I plan on picking up my guitar at some point and re-learning it...then finding something to put my sound through a meat grinder(a distortion or vox pedal or something along those lines), because that'd just be neat. Also, I need to get on breaking in my boots because the backs of my ankles are RAW.
There, done for a bit. that was a long fucking entry for me, considering I usually don't have too much to say regarding my life.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled browsing of lolcats, internet porn and music(or internet music porn. oh yeaaaaaaaah).
Mood: Bored and Impatient
Music: God Module - spooky
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Abandoned Photography
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June 24, 2008, 03:43:pm
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We first headed to Talbotville.
We found an abandoned barn partway there on highway 4, but were unsure whether or not to check it out.
We spotted an abandoned Soda shoppe called Food N Foam. Black and yellow signs hung on yellow fiber cord proclaiming "No Trespassing", not that that stopped us.
I snapped a few photos of the area. The sign interested me. It was heavily rusted around the letters, and the white paint peeled in a strange but fascinating way.
I snapped a photo of the picnic tables. They were long forgotten, and white and dark blue mold and fungus grew between the rotting boards. A newspaper or flyer from some time ago sat folded on the deck, rotting along with some scraps of fabric, from I don't know where. I had hoped the door was open, or at least accessible, as I head the place is still up for sale, and might have some old soda machines left behind. It wasn't.
We moved on, and decided to go back to the barn, which was set far back from the highway and partially hidden with overgrown grass.
Upon entering, we found the place mostly empty. The doorway looked interesting in the comfortably dark barn, with the only visible light being that of the sunlight through the doorway and through the cracks between the boards. I took a photo.
There were some rolls of rotting, train track like fencing in one corner, and in another an upturned bathtub was corroding into the most beautiful shades of blue, green, orange, brown, and purple. I took a photo of the fencing, and one of the bathtub.
There was a second level, but no visible way up. What may have been the skeleton of a ladder lay rotting some ways away. Plastic disposable camera parts were scattered and half melted onto a shelf. We moved to the back doorway, passing more camera parts. Out back, more half hidden structures crumbled slowly into nothingness. I took a photo of a silo, which looked so much like a strange castle's tower with its rusting ladder and narrow windows.
Turning around I found a concrete structure of unknown purpose. Later speculation led me to believe it was used for sheep or pigs. I climbed a couple layers of rubble and took a photo of it.
A large, rectangular basin lay within it, now filled nearly to the brim with hard packed dirt. Scraps of material lay rotting in the opposite end under a little window. I sat down on the edge fo the basin to rest my cramped legs and to remove my sunglasses for a moment. Despite the coolness of the shade it was still very bright.
Exiting the structure, I found an oddly angled pole with an even odder bend to it. I took a photo of it, with the other silo in the background.
Someone became a little too interested in what were were doing there, so we made ready to leave. I took a photo of some old farming equipment, barely visible above the grass and rusting away. We took off
Later, in the evening, I watched a storm roll in from my backyard. The clouds were very well defined, and showed multiple hues of yellow, brown, and gray. I still had some extra film left, so I took a photo of it, just before the rain started to come down. Seemed a fitting end to an interesting day.
Mood: Serene...and hungry
Music: Cinema Strange - laughing bloody murder
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Long fucking post.
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May 26, 2008, 09:47:pm
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First draft of a philosophy essay. I kind of enjoyed writing this essay. I had to base the essay off of a philisophical question from a novel, and chose Isaac Asimov's "Foundation". I haven't written anything of my novel in some time, as I've had a nasty bout of writer's block, but I wanted to post something somewhere that I've been writing and thinking on.
Here we go. it's about a 5 or 10 minute read, but bear with it.
Religion And Control As Seen In Isaac Asimov’s ‘Foundation’.
In this paper I will be exploring on a somewhat basic level the politics and religious ideas/philosophies presented in the novel “Foundation” by Isaac Asimov, regarding religion and control. I will be exploring the idea of religion in society in the words of Isaac Asimov (Primarily from a humanist point of view), Karl Marx (Marxism), and Socrates (Realism).
I will be presenting the concept of control, and the possibility of a society built with no religious influence (though not an altogether religion free world, as I believe in the right of free will). I will not, however, set out to prove that my view is the correct one. I can only agree or disagree with what ideas have already been presented and present my own.
The religion created by Salvor Hardin in the novel, “Foundation”, and based off of the idea of a ‘Galactic Spirit’, with Psychohistorian Hari Seldon as it’s ‘prophet’, intrigued me, in that it managed to quickly effect control over several planets with relative ease. It led me to re-examine the modern religions, which I still regard with distaste, and led me to the question “Is it right to control a population (of any kind, be it continental, municipal, or planetary) with religion”?
Socrates claimed that “knowledge comes from virtue, and that the knowledge coming about as a result of virtue should allow a person to affect control over his or her own self”. This seems to suggest that virtue and self-control come strictly from oneself, rather than from an imposed moral structure (as is common belief), while Isaac Asimov stated in an interview with a paper called the ‘Free Inquiry’ in 1982, that “If you are ethical only because you believe in God, you are buying your ticket to heaven or trying to tear up your ticket to hell. In either case, you are just being a shrewd profiteer, nothing else. The idea of being ethical is to be ethical for no reason except that that is the way to be if you want the world to run smoothly. I think that people who say virtue is its own reward or honesty is the best policy have the right idea”, further indicating a belief in the autonomy of morality, using the example that “…If a group of people are living together in a community where there is a lot of lying and stealing going on, it is an unpleasant way to live. But if everyone tells the truth and is honest and thoughtful of his neighbor, it is a good way to live. You don't need to go any further than that.”
He has also stated “To surrender to ignorance and call it God has always been premature, and it remains premature today”, and one of my favorite quotes, “We owe it to ourselves as respectable human beings, as thinking human beings, to do what we can to make humanity more rational. Humanists recognize that it is only when people feel free to think for themselves, using reason as their guide, that they are best capable of developing values that succeed in satisfying human needs and serving human interests”. Even having stated, amusingly, that “Creationists make it sound as though a theory is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night”!
In my opinion, religion should most certainly not control society. I most certainly agree with Asimov’s idea of rationality, though much of my experience with the paranormal shows me that not everything is subject to rationality, and I most certainly do not consider myself a Humanist (in fact I find myself quite disenchanted with humanity, perhaps even a little misanthropic). Nonetheless, it is the responsibility of humans to think for themselves, and to be free insomuch as thought and mindset not being obscured by preconception and indoctrination.
In regards to religion, it should not dictate morality or knowledge to the people, but leave the people free to their own exploration of life and existence (after all, how is one to live without experiencing life?), as well as leaving them free to think, to speak, and to act, within the bounds of reason and respect. Regarding Socrates’ idea of knowledge creating virtue and virtue commanding morality, I must disagree. As an example, someone with an acute knowledge of biology can save a life in fantastic ways, or take it in particularly nasty ways.
Knowledge cannot be virtuous in and of itself, and must be tempered with wisdom, reason, and perhaps a touch of logic in order to maintain an idea of virtue (it should also be noted that virtue is a self defined concept, like morality).
Now, all this begs the question “Does a culture exist without religion?”, and this is a difficult question to answer. Again referring to Karl Marx, he once stated that “…religion is an expression of material realities and economic injustice.” By his logic, The problems of religion become the problems of the society that religion controls. To put that into perspective, one could examine strictly religious Europe, including the crusades. When what the religion (Christianity) viewed as the Holy Land (Jerusalem) was occupied by Islamic peoples, it became the problem of all of Christian Europe to take it back from the Muslims (and damaging relations between the two religious groups irreparably, creating a conflict still remembered to this day, and quite likely one of the major sources for Islamic extremists’ harsh treatment of Christians in wartime). Later, this developed into a war against pretty much everything (oddly including Jews, the original occupiers of the so-called Holy Land), but that’s besides the point (sort of). Though this is the most historically visible and impactful of these situations, one can also look to Islamic Extremism in modern times. The problems of the Religious Government, once again, become the problems of the people(as per the current conflict between the US and Iraq, and looming conflict between the US and Iran).
Now, in the case of Marxist communism, it replaces religion with a cult of leader, which is still religious in a less direct way (though this was obviously not Marx’s intention), which becomes similar to the God-King ideas of Ancient Egypt, and the Monarchies of Abrahamic-based religions. This is not the only option for a religionless culture, but the most likely outcome in today’s western societies, where we have become so used to having someone tell us what to do and how to go about doing it. Humanity has in the last few hundred years shown that for the most part it is not yet ready for freedom of thought, because, as stated above, humans are simply used to having someone tell them what to do, and have become unable to think for themselves.
But is a world without religion sustainable? Humanists think so. Humanism states that a world without religion is not only sustainable, but preferable as well, as humanists do not believe that a god concept needs to exist to indicate morality. As things stand at the moment, we have a set of morals based off of both the basic wants and needs of most humans, and off of Christian doctrine. I think that if we were to eliminate the concept of religion from societal control and government, there would be some changes, but for the most part these morals would be the same. Thus we would have a sustainable morality, the basis of social behavior, and a sustainable society (without the blanket influence of religion) as a result of re-established ‘proper’ societal behaviors.
Now, if religion is unneeded to control society, who should have control? I present the concepts behind what has been termed “Celtic Anarchism”.
The ancient Celts had no police, no enforced justice. All Landowners, Craftsmen, and professional whatevers were able to become members of a committee-like government known as a Tuath. These Tuaths met yearly to discuss war, economics, policy, and the Kings. Members of a Tuath were not bound to any particular Tuath, and could leave one Tuath if they preferred the views of another. Kings were elected, and were more like a military commander and possibly a warrior-priest under the Druids than a Figurehead of the same monarchial concept we have today. The King had no political power, and strictly served the people in times of need, as well as presiding over Tuath meetings.
If these basic ideas were applied to the modern world, they would require little change. Committees would meet more often, obviously, as there are more issues, until those issues were resolved and things settled into place. The King idea could easily be replaced with a President or Prime Minister or some other title, though they could simply be referred to by “Leader” or even no title at all and simply a name. This concept can be separated entirely from religion with ease, and seems, at least on the surface, to be an easily sustainable concept and a workable government, if applied to say, a population under 10 000 people. It could be as easy as dividing a large city into quadrants, and having each quadrant have it’s own committee. Granted, as one could leave a particular committee at any given time and rejoin another, this could create some unbalanced numbers, but this wouldn’t be a problem as long as things were kept civil between the different municipalities, which, devoid of concrete politics and religion, and instead given over to the encouragement of discussion and free thought, would likely not be difficult.
I feel that my point here has been made, and I’ll have to go with a take it or leave it sort of conclusion. The ideas have been presented. Some I agree with, and some I do not, and some I have expanded upon. Further, My point of view is arrived at, through speculation, rather than the desire to prove or disprove a point. It comes down to conjecture and theory, rather than established fact, because religionless society does not currently exist. Perhaps it will, and perhaps it won’t. Maybe a time will come when humanity will awaken from its’ long slumber at the hands of falsity and self-imposed stupidity, perhaps we will open our eyes to the unnecessary control we’ve been subjecting ourselves to for so many generations, but then again, perhaps the majority of us have come to take such comfort in our cages that the cages will hold us and our descendants until our race simply withers into mindlessness.
Mood: Somewhat depressed
Music: Joy Division - Isolation
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Finally updated!
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April 13, 2008, 02:40:pm
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It's been forever since I've updated my blog on here.
I've been pretty busy recently. I've been looking for work to no avail, and I've been busy with school and moreso with Xbox. I've become addicted to Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion.
Beyond that I've been cooking up more ideas for my book. I'm still only 5 chapters into it and I don't think I've written anything past the end of chapter 5 for about 2 months. I just havent had any inspiration.
Also, I've fought my way through a period of rather nasty depression. Pretty much alright now, but it was touchy for a while.
So to summarize that and add a bit:
I'm looking for work
I'm addicted to Oblivion
I'm planning my steampunk computer case/keyboard/mouse/monitor/speakers mod(for when I finally get a damn job).
I was depressed and now I'm not.
I'm bored.
Mood: Bored
Music: Draconian - Cthulhu Rising
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