Still Depressing..dont read if you are gonna criticize
July 01, 2011, 10:40:pm
i keep thinking about him.. he says he wanted to get back together.. and now he dont want me... i havent ate in like 4 days.. i cant sleep much, all i do is cry.. he WAS the one for me.. i have no idea wat to do anymore... i love him so much.. i need him to breathe...
Depresso---dont have to read..i juss need to get it out
June 30, 2011, 12:49:pm
so once again i am single.. it was our 6 months.. i havent ate since we broke up or even had a drink... he was all for me.. i was 100% he was for me... its complicated why we broke up... but... he has a 4 year daughter who has brain cancer.. his ex baby mama hates me.. she never seen or met me.. so she wouldnt let him see his daughter because of me.. so wenever him or his mom wanted to see her, i would have to go somewhere else. and thats happened like so much lately.. i literally juss got kicked out last time and was told to go somewhere else for a few hours.. i moved to missouri..i kno nobody.... i got so upset and crying... he didnt even seem to care.. i decided to go get my stuff and juss go home.. and thts wen he decied to end it.. it was too complicated from going place to place and stuff to do.. everything is my fault.. i juss wanna die... but i wont do anything crazy but its how i feel... he was mine.
this whole week has been crazy.. ive been packing and finishing up work and spendin last minutes with family before i pack up and leave for missouri its been so crazy with family and stuff... but this is a good thing for me. jake's daughter has surgery monday sometime and i hope it all goes well.. i am quite nervous and i hope they fix the brain tumor and do chem o and all that good stuff..im clueless on that stuff...but i pray for the best! i prob wont be active as much anymore, but hey im living life and finally being on meh own and bein with meh love : ) btw in case you didnt kno here is meh new tattoo its freshly done so it doesnt look that good, itll look better wen its healed.. DUH!! lol and plus now i have fire red hair.. looks weird..but im gettin use to it lol im postin up pix but here is one for now : )
PEACE <333
Mood: happy: ) Music: listenin to curious george lol
