March! March marks the beginning of the fifth month I've lived in Seattle.
The first two months were absolutely horrible, aside from being able to see and reconnect with my Daughter. I'd only been able to save up $600.00 by the time I flew out here, and $300.00 of that went to rent, which turned out to be a big fucking mistake.
How can rent be a bad thing? It was because of the people and the place I lived in, I'd been mislead by a friend about how many people live there, the living conditions, my roommates, and ultimately was let down and had some shit stolen by said friend (we no longer speak). While living there It took me a month to find a job, which I go through my only decent room mate at the time. During that month and the two weeks it took me to get a paycheck I sold plasma, it took me a bus ride of 40 minutes to get to the donation place, and just long enough to get processed and donate (this place is soooo unorganized D: and over crowded!) that my bus transfer was rendered useless. First donation you get $20.00, second donation that week gets you $40.00, a bit unevenly distributed (in MN it was $25/35). Bus fair is $2.25 during rush it's $2.50. I spent most of my plasma money on bus fair and attempting to feed myself. I couldn't buy too much food with the money I had because of two reasons, A) Cost of living is high, everything is hella expensive. B) Where I lived at the time, there was no room in the freezer or fridge. It was small and there were already four people living there and then add me...
I spent a lot of the first 60 days sleeping when I was hungry, because I couldn't afford to feed myself. When I did start my job I walked 2 miles everyday, to work and back. I was constantly sick, and tired, on my days off I would bus to where my daughter lived and spend 2 days there with her.
By mid December I thought things were going well, I'd finally gotten my first paycheck (12.90 an hour!) and I wasn't starving anymore! But then one of my room mates drunkenly bitch fitted at me and kicked me out, all of my room mates were present at the time and said drunken bitch was completely out of line, yet no one stood up for me. I was asleep and she woke me up to tell me to sleep on the floor, I was worthless, I was late with rent (had just gotten paid that day), and she basically went on and on about how I shouldn't be there and was useless.
While living there in the house I had 2 suitcases which I kept out of the way behind the couch I slept on. I cleaned up the mess of an apartment more than once, vacuumed, organized it so it was less claustrophobic (it was a basement one bedroom with 5 people living in it and two cats), cleaned up after myself and never ate anyone's food. When I was there I was asleep, I tried to stay out of peoples way. I never cleaned or moved anything without getting an okay from at least one or two room mates.
After walking home from work I was constantly locked out. I was left out and excluded through out my stay there, by people who at the time claimed to be my friends. So, in the middle of December I got kicked out, packed up my things and with the help of my friends car I was able to move into my ex's living room... not the best situation. He and I get along well enough, but he is verbally abusive to me and has a way of killing my self esteem, not to mention he's a messy bastard and a complete leech.
I'll buy food, he'll eat it an wont replace it, I'll take out the trash and clean after it's been pilling up and smelling with no thanks... ugh. Bright side is he bought me a lap top, I've since paid him back for it 100%. I also get to see my kid everyday.
January 16th, I get laid off along with the last 20 new hires due to reduced work hours... major bummer and depression hit. I liked my job a lot. Also due to having lived in WA for such little time I am apparently unable to get unemployment... Signed up for the "on call" team, so that if they need my to come into work to cover anyone's shift they can give me a call. This has happened once. A new building is supposed to open this month and I was told I'd be going back to full time when that happens.
I plan to call Monday to see if that's still the plan.
January was Laura's birthday, which her dad bought her no presents and didn't help with anything financially. I spent $200, on presents, food, decorations, cake (which I baked). She had a good 5th birthday. My mother sent $50.00, which we used to go see Beauty and the Beast in 3D and she picked out a dress to buy with the remainder.
I've been sleeping on piles of blankets on the floor, being unemployed, having no social life, stressed, and depressed. February I filed my taxes, have since gotten them back and have paid off two debts, and will pay off two more.
At this time I'm not sure if I want to continue living in Seattle or would rather take Laura and move back to Minnesota. Her father an I have different parenting styles. His mainly stemming from shouting so he doesn't have to leave the computer chair. There are days where he is a good father but it's infuriating to see how often she is ignored by him, I'm not sure if that's because I'm around or not. Regardless I want to be in a situation where I wont be a part time parent, and can support myself and her without having to sell my plasma again.
It's been a long stay... and this has been a long post. I've probably forgot somethings, at times it has been hectic. Mood: reflective Music: This world is a tomb - The Human Abstract
pretty explanatory. I had an awesome day out and about, but now that i'm home i'm bored off my ass. hahaha so, what do you people do to cure your boredom?
