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Abandoned_Sanity's Journal
The Mind Abandoned
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Sleep...
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January 11, 2008, 01:56:pm
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For the past few days I've been horribly sleep deprived.
Ian, you'd be proud of me.
I actually went to sleep after Dad left for work!
And I didn't even get up to make sure my sister got off to school.
Well, I was awake..sort of...and I just her to get up.
So yeah, I got plenty of sleep today!!
Mood: Rested.
Music: All of Your Love -- Hellogoodbye.
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Bored and bitchy.
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January 10, 2008, 06:31:pm
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Well, I suggest if you don't want to read a bit of bitching
you should stop reading this now. Mainly because, I'm sure
that's what this will turn out to be. Just a rant and rave.
Lastnight was goddamn annoying. I just start talking to a
friend and two seconds into our conversation my dad walks
into my room says "Girls go clean up the kitchen before
dinner." and "I need to get on the computer."
Apparently, he didn't see that I was still using it.
Then before dinner I slip into my room to read a few chapters in the book I'm reading.
My dad sends my sister in to see if something is wrong.
Well, yeah something is wrong. But I shouldn't have to give a damn report of what I'm doing.
"Um, yeah, first I'm going to go pee.
Then I plan on putting a pair of earphones on and listening to music while I read.
Is that ok, Dad?"
GOD!
Then there's the whole assuming I'm going to do something.
Don't get me wrong, I actually like the GF Dad has now,
but when he says "Oh we're going to go off somewhere for a bit. We're leaving Ellie here." (Ellie is the GFs daughter)
Um, yeah sure leave her, THANKS FOR FUCKING ASKING!
Good, Lord. I may be his daughter, but I'm at an age now where he could have and show a little respect.
Again, don't get me wrong, I like Lynda, Dad's GF, but she's been on my ass for the past three days to call the college.
I called yesterday and had to leave a message.
Lynda calls today and says, "Call again."
WTF! Classes start on Monday! I haven't the time to prepare at this point!
Although, I do know that getting into school now would be good.
I would have insurance and I need new glasses because my dog decided to tear them apart, I can still wear them, but they're too loose on my face. It's soo annoying.
On Saturday, I'm being forced to go to Lynda's birthday party.
I hate parties.
I like being alone.
I like solitude and quiet.
I hate being around people I don't know.
I hate the fake smiles they give.
I hate the awkward conversations they try to start
just to be friendly.
Ack!! It just drives me nuts!
However, I have to go because if I don't Lynda will think I hate her and then I'll have Dad on my ass going, "Well she thinks you don't like her."
That's a very familiar tune actually, "Well, she thinks you don't like her." or "She thinks Ellie annoys you."
Damn right Ellie annoys me! She's a little shit, but I'm not going to actually tell anyone that! WTF?!
That would go over well, "Yeah, um, Ellie bugs the hell out of me. She's a little shit, but so are most kids."
But I digress.
The tune is a familiar one, I heard it once again for the millionth time lastnight. Dad said that he and Lynda were going to go off for a while that night and that they were taking Ellie. I looked up and said, "What?"
Then Dad goes, "Well Lynda thinks that you don't like Ellie, because of what you said lastnight."
=/
"What did I say lastnight?"
"Well you asked if she was going to put Ellie to sleep before we left."
"Yeah, I know, what's wrong with that? I just wanted to know."
"It's the way you said it."
"I didn't say it any particular way, I was just asking."
(In my mind I'm thinking, Yeah, so? You didn't ask if I would watch the kid so why should I just take on the responsibility when you walk out the door?)
"Well, still it's just the way you said it."
Gah, whatever! I think from now on if I'm not asked to do something more than two hours in advance I'm not going to do it. Fuck it.
I'm tired of Dad thinking that he can just say something and I will magically appear at his side to see what he needs.
Yeah, you read right, if you're still reading. He does shit like that.
He won't ask or even demand he'll say something like, *big sigh* "Oh I need to take my boots off." Many people would say that and get to taking their boots off.
Not Dad.
No, he just sits there and sighs over and over again talking about how tired he is and how hard he's worked that day. And after a few minutes if Mashayla or I haven't come obediently to his side he'll finally ask...no...demand one of us to take his boots off.
It's positively ridiculous!
Or he'll do this, *big sigh* "I need a drink of water." ah, but to make things even more annoying he's sitting at the table. All he has to do is get up, take two steps, grab his glass, turn on the water, hold the glass under the water, turn the tap off, take a drink, take two steps back, sit down, and VIOLA!! He has his drink of water.
Simple right?
Well, this is how Dad get's his drink, it's very much like how he takes his boots off. *big sigh* "I need a drink of water." Mashayla or I get the damn water.
He's fucking lazy.
And he says our aunt is a lazy ass.
I wonder where she learned how to do that??
Ass.
Grr.
Oh and he's now made it so that it will be my fault if he doesn't get up.
For those of you who, if you're still reading this, those of you who have read some of my previous journals you know this already.
What you don't know is that he's also set it up so that it'll be my fault if my sister doesn't get up.
Lovely.
I can't wait to fuck up one morning.
Because when they get home they'll have a fucking blast guilt tripping me.
Oh how appropriate, the song "Totally Fucked" just came on.
Exactly.
I'm totally fucked.
Ah, fuck it.
Mood: Bored and Bitchy
Music: Totally Fucked -- Spring Awakening Cast
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There is no such thing as "bright and early".....
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January 08, 2008, 08:05:am
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Just dark, cold, and early as hell!!
Good morning, bitches!!
Mood: Tired!!!
Music: Not a damn thing.
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I didn't wake up....
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January 05, 2008, 09:57:am
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This morning with Dad. But I blame him because he took his phone away from me lastnight, "Well you're not using it."
I obviously didn't get up because I knew that he had an alarm and if he overslept that was his problem. Hehe. So when he comes home and tries to guilt trip me about not getting up and not packing his lunch...I'm not going to listen to him!!
Ahahahhah!!
Ass.
Mood: Groggy.
Music: N/A
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It has been.....
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January 04, 2008, 07:57:am
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A SHIT ASS MORNING!!
First, I couldn't sleep ALL DAMN NIGHT! I did that drift off for an hour and then wake up again shit!
Second, my dog was hogging the bed, GRR!
Third, after I let my dog outside this morning so she wouldn't shit or piss on my damn carpet, she started playing the "I'm gonna scratch on the door like I want to come in and when they open the door run the fuck off!" Yeah so that pissed me off.
Fourth, when my dad's ride for work got here, MY DOG(yes her again) almost got her stupid ass run over. And then she wouldn't come to me when I called her. Dad's friend James got her and handed her over to me.
Fifth, THAT FUCKING DOG SLAMMED HER FACE INTO MINE! My god damn glasses have already been broken by her ass and now they're broken AGAIN!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
At this point the world can fuck off. Yes, I'm mad at the world because of my fucking dog. FUCKING DEAL WITH IT!
(Well except for the people I love...this little bit doesn't apply to you. And chances are if I love you, you read this. *kisses*)
I'm going to go clean.
Mood: Fuck you.
Music: Popular--Wicked
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