We`re the bottom of the human well
We bleed and scream like hell
We`re the ones they are kickin` down
We`re the ones they don`t want around
You want to tell me now
How it`s so beautiful
We`re the people that are fightin` the wars
We`re the people they don`t need anymore
We`re the bottom of the human well
We bleed and scream like hell
We`re the people that are fightin` the wars
We`re the ones that don`t count anymore
We`re the ones they are kickin` down
We`re the ones they don`t want around
We`re the people that are fightin` the wars
We`re the people that are fightin` the wars
{my weakness, I want you to know: there is a small framed girl, hair pulled back in a mess, wearing a tank top and a warm towel, curled up in the midst of a dark apartment, pup laying on her lap, tears streaming down her cheeks; she is happy, happier than she has been in a very very long time... thank you.
If you can't hear, in your 5 million mile away room, in the midst of your slumber, she keeps repeating that she loves you, in every way she can think of. She whispers it, she yells it, always with a smile on her face. And she sings Jimi Hendrix's, "may this be love", and "love or confusion" in ways she has never sang.
My heart has never beat so hard...I'm so happy, thank you.
love,
xsandos,
always}
{{--everything that we shared....i want to mutilate....this thing that i loved....i wanna mutilate....every dream that you have....i want to mutilate....i'm repulsed by every memory of you.........every thought you invade....i want to mutilate....every emotion inside me....i wanna mutilate....everything that you said....i want to mutilate....i'm repulsed by every memory of you..........every breath that you take....i want to mutilate....every memory of you....i wanna mutilate....every thought that i have....i want to mutilate....i'm repulsed by every memory of you..........every word that you say....i want to mutilate....everything that you love....i wanna mutilate....everything that you touched....i want to mutilate....i'm repulsed by every memory of you......x...x.....x...x....x.....every letter in your fucking name....i want to mutilate....every promise you made....i wanna mutilate.....i'm not the same person anymore....i'm not the same person........remove and dis-con-nect.....remove and dis-con-nect.....remove and dis-con-nect.....delete.....erase.....destroy......destroy......destroy--}} Mood: dis-con-nect-ed
Later…
When you close your eyes
I’m still here
Can you feel me breathe ?
When the torment wakes you unaware
I’ll kiss your tears
And blood away
As you take comfort from his presence
Don’t forget
I’m still here
When I say hello don’t be surprised
Or try & hide
Just say goodbye
Just say goodbye…
Your pathetic lives
Mean nothing to me
Your pathetic dreams
They mean nothing
Your pathetic lies
So small & white
Your pathetic lie
You broke my heart
Your pathetic love
You hide inside
Your pathetic love
& the damage caused
Your pathetic...
...So just you & me
Just you & me
You & me
We’ll sort this out
…later Mood: Wish I cared...
Mundane shallow societies brainwashed with technology
Spend in debt enslaved to conform
Hidden humanity unaware of existence
Breathing heavy desires thoughts unwelcome
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Fear commonplace numbed intelligence
Drugged for your own good
Hypocritical mass ignorant of its acceptance
Angered by abortion & logic
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
The sleepwalking all sheep & dazed
United in hate through words that make you feel safe
Social graves of friendship
Lonely dreams of meaning and worth
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Haunted by empty realities depression
Mirrored reflections of the dead eyed celebrity
Masked smiles feel needed all a part of this nothingness
That limits your boundaries
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
The frame is your conclusion
Landscapes extend beyond the cell you create
Online escape denial inside cold fear
Of the square eyed personality killer
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Death pollution of consciousness
Acceptance speech illusion
Freedoms safety debt to soldiers
Dying in lines of illegal orders
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Childs wrong colour is freedoms cost
Worth less than flags
Empty symbols of nothingness
Dripping crimson & blind
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Tears so moving the actor eulogises
The crucifixion myth & stirs hatred
Craving attention his fire starved of oxygen
The false flag prophecies became a religion
Bodies nameless
Content & blameless
Aware & in denial
Don’t tread on the hallowed ground
Crippled mind faith & fate
Thought paralysis keeps on repeating
Repetition bland safe for consumption
Keeps repeating
Keeps on repeating
Keep repeating
‘til you believe
The happy sheen content consumer
The happy sheen condemned consumer
The happy sheen content consumer
The happy sheen condemned consumer
Bodies nameless
Completely blameless
Bodies nameless
Corrupt & shameless
Bodies nameless
Completely blameless
Cocooned in the comfort of the myth
Bodies nameless
Corrupt & shameless
Bodies nameless
Dead futures hopeless
{incomplete}
we're not aloud to talk about how daddy beat you are we ?
no
ok...well we're not going to
ok...well we're not going to
yea...but the thing is you are what you are because of it aren't you ?
yea
yea...you wanna be just like all the other sweet little girls whose daddy loves them, who feels good about who they are...but you can't be that can you ?
no I can't
no, and you wish you could don't you ?
I wish
yea...tell everybody what your mum said when you were a baby...little girl...tell 'em
my mum loved me
right...
but she was disapointed in me
yea...does she know ?
she knows...i make her cry
yea...that make you feel good ?...does that make you feel good honey ?
you think it made me feel good ?
i think you need it...i think it reminds you of something
remind me of home
yea...yea...you wish daddy loved you, that's how he expressed his love - like that
yes
yea
oh god what happened to this little girl, she's a little fucking pumpkin, a little cute little girl...but daddy had to beat her, make her a whore, she could've been just like everybody else but daddy had to make her a whore...huh ?
& you like that ?
no i don't
no ?
no as a matter of fact i hate it, i'm just an observer that's all...
are you ?
yea...yea, it's not my fault...did daddy beat the dog ?
daddy ? no
no he did not, you know why ?
no
coz he thought more highly of the dog than you
<->
...you wanted real ? this is fucking real...i don't care what you fucking do to me, i don't care what you do to my soul...coz it's already been there...
<->
i understand not to hit you...that doesn't mean i don't want to
oh god i wish you didn't say that, now you made me angry...now you made me angry
i'm behaving myself like a good fucking lttle girl
shut up
aren't i ?...aren't i behaving myself just like you want ? huh?
you're just missing one thing honey...you're not calling me what you wanna call me...i know who you're talking to...i said i know who you're talking to...you're not talking to me...we both know who you're talking to...
<->
what happened angel ?
<->
fucking beat me - you want me to cry ?
no i don't want you to cry
fucking beat me is that what you want ?
no i don't
<->
i wanna know what's goin on...you tell me what's goin on...
in my head ?
are you better than this ?
no
then why are you crying ?
<->
whatever you fucking think i deserve...i ain't telling you shit
<->
i'm here to be fucking used you hear me ?...i'm here to be fucking used
<->
ask them if they're watching whore ?...ask all you're friends, ask 'em all...
you're all watching...you're all watching...
watching little xxxxx get fucked...
what do you feel right now ?
ask them whore...
what do you feel right now watching this ?...damn you...
let me hear whore...
damn you fucking all...
...they had to turn xxxxx into a whore for their pleasure...didn't they ?...didn't they honey ?...huh ?...is that what happened angel ?
YES
...ask them if they're happy ?
ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY ?...COZ THIS IS WHAT YOU GOT...
<->
you're gonna cum, are you whore ?
<->
i'm not fucking happy...i'm not fucking happy...you think i wanna be fucking like this ?...you think i wanna be your meat toy ?...you think i want this ?...this is what i am...this is what i fucking am...
<->
fuck you...fuck you...fucking fuck you...fuck you...fucking shit...fucking...fucking whore...you shit whore...you're a fucking shit whore, you hear me...i'll fuck you, i'll fuck you in the fucking ass like that...i'll fuck you...understand me ?...you understand me ?...
...in his words you disgust me...
<->
i hope you like what you see
shut up...she goes to college, she's such a fucking good girl...she works so hard...
yes
& all she thinks, that's she's good for nothing...good to be used...
true
yea...amazing isn't it...
how someone can be dergraded to this point ?
yea
yea
how did it happen ?...
...maybe i started out this way
