Submitted by: CinNamOn_SpiDEr___x
"One of my close friends whom i had met when i first moved to this town passed away a couple of weeks ago. To me it was such a shock at the loss as she helped me through so much. She was there for me whilst my sister went through her depression. She opened my eyes to what my sister was feeling and i owe her big time. she really taught me alot. I keep finding possession of hers that she gave me and it brings back such good memories. Everyone in the town loved her. you asked anyone and they will tell you she was amazing. my one and only quote when asked what do i think of adi was Cool as fuck i could not describe her any more. Adi if your looking down on me now, this beers for you my dear!! ps Bert will miss you =p"
Submitted by: Psychoward
"My friend Pete Banks was killed in a motorbike accident last May, he was a mentor to me and when i was the geeky little kid in high school he looked after me and my friends and got me into metal music :)
we kept in touch when i left school. But he was such a cool guy, a biker and computer geek he was so funny and nice. I will never forget him for getting me through highschool."
Submitted by: Lady__Stardust
"friday the 30th of March was the date that my grandma passed away. I was really close to her, out of the 9 grandchildren that she had, i was her favourite because i was the first girl. We were so close over the years, i stayed over at her house so many times to look after he while my nan and grandad were away, and i actually enjoyed myself, not many people of my age would enjoy sitting playing dominoes with an 88 year old woman for a week. but i loved it.
one thing that really gets to me is the fact that out of all her great grandchildren, i am the only one that she told that she loved. and im so proud that i meant so much to her.
it only really dawned on me that she'd gonna on her birthday which was yesterday. Its only a few days after her funeral, which was heartbreaking, yet going to the cemetary and laying flowers got to me quite a bit.
i still love her so much, and i know she is looking down on me, she has made that clear by sending the little boy back to my room *he used to appear when i had something on my mind and i saw him again the other day, dusting my shelves, i know its her because she was really clean and wouldve been disgusted by the dust in my room* <3"
Submitted by: Cinnamon-Spider
"Rachael: My best friend, killed at the age of 13 in a lawnmower accident. She was mowing the lawn, taking turns riding the tractor with her dad when she hit a piece of snowblower laying in the yard and the tractor flipped over on top of her. She survived for 13 minutes before suffocating. Sweetest girl EVER. Love ya Rach. <3
Grandpa: Survived the death of his wife through cancer and beat his own cancer, only to take his own life because of loneliness.
Uncle Steve: Died in a car accident on Christmas morning. He protected his newborn baby girl and in turn gave up his own life. She wouldn't have survived had he not been in the backseat with no seatbelt."
Submitted by: sketty_monster
"kayne and daniel: died in a car accident. they were such a good laugh at parties, strange that they'll never be at any more.
smeg: burned to death in a car accident. such a terrible way to go. she had the craziest wee dog. and even though she was a complete ned and her friends wanted to beat me up, she'd still go down the park with us and get drunk. good times
my granda: some uncomfortable arguements, terribly stubborn man. but so many good memories. even if some of them weren't exactly uh, normal? "dram a day keeps the doctor away. apples are for birds". not being able to go to his funeral was difficult. i'll never forget him"
Submitted by: Dolly_Dead
My grandad - he died of cancer when I was 11. I still miss him and it brings tears to my eyes thinking about him. He was so caring and sweet...I have never met anyone who knew him who could say a bad thing about him.
My friend Dom - He took his own life a couple of years ago. The turnout at his funeral said it all. He was loved by so many.
Rose - I've got journal entires about Rose, and I was absolutely devistated when she passed away. She had cancer for the majority of the time that I knew her, she fought so hard, but it got the better of her. She was a friend and a mentor to me. SHe helped me through some of the toughest times and still not a day goes past where I don't think about her and thank her for everything she did for me. And I hate that I couldn't go to her funeral because of uni, it still hurts."
Submitted by: Twigs
"My dad: He died 6 years ago from cirrhosis of the liver. So since then alcohol has always been a terrible reminder. He was actually my step dad but he was the most amazing man in my life. My mom had said when I first met him when I was 2 I asked him to pick me up, which was out of character for me since I usually hated strangers and when he picked me up I said "Are you going to be my new daddy?"
I'm crying just writing this.
He was everything to me. "
Submitted by: Paramour_sheek
"Ryan Peters: My first boyfriend. The first person to ever accept me, and love me, for who I am. The only person to never try to change me. He left for college in 2004, and killed himself about a year later. We argued over the phone that night. I told him I didn't want to be in love with him any more, to stop being a drama queen, that his suicidal threats were pathetic and attention-seeking. His flatmate found him hanging the next morning.
I couldn't attend his funeral, I've never seen his grave. I still cry when I think of him.
My perfect boy, whom I'll never forget. The most beautiful person I know, who died before he ever had a chance to be imperfect."
Submitted by: SpikeGothicFreak666
"My Grandfather He was the greatest man you would have ever known. He was the most generous man you could have ever met. Though most of you never got the chance to meet him. Here are some of the experiences I had with my grandfather before he passed away. When I was 10 and liked Avril Lavigne, he bought me 2 first row tickets to see her in Torono. I will thrilled. He wanted me to be first in line so the night before the concert he went downtown Toronto and sat infront of the Air Canada Centre from 4am til 6pm when I got there. It turns out he brought 4 big boxes of donuts for the rest of the people in the line. As he left, they asked me if he was my grandfather, obviously I said yes because he was. They replied with "Wow, you are very lucky to have him, he is the nicest man I have ever met". All I could do was smile. He was also a great chef, he taught me how to make alot of stuff. Everytime we would go out somewhere like to Wonderland or the CNE he would always offer to buy me something. He knew I loved Candy Apples and Cotton Candy so once I got off of a ride he would be standing there with candy for me lol. I will honestly never forget him, and although we all lost him February 28th 2004, he is still here. He will always be here, and he will always be my grandfather and no one will ever be a nice as he was. "
Submitted by: ReflectionOfMisery
"My mother: She died when I was 14 due to an accidental drug overdose. She was not only my mother, she was my best friend. She loved me for me, she accepted me for me, and she always protected me and took my side whenever my dad or his family would give me problems. She influenced me so much in my life. She introduced me to goth rock, industrial, and vampire books & movies. She helped make me who I am today. Not a day goes by that I don't think about her and miss her. R.I.P. Mommy ¢¾
My grandfather: He died just last summer from a seizure. What pains me the most about it is that it was in his sleep and I never got to see him before he died since I had been staying at my sister's and I didn't find out until I got home. He was such a great guy to me. He was like a father figure to me when my dad was never around or too busy working to spend time with me. I'll never forget the precious memories I have with him."
Submitted by: steel_apathy
My Dad, Ian Gardner: He was a fantastic artist and historian. He spent time doing things he enjoyed and helping us kids rather than making money. He Died of Bowel Cancer two years ago, he was ill for four years, but he never gave up, he was strong for us, and rarely did i see him upset. He left me lots of advice, fun storys and beautiful gifts, some thousands of years old :)
Sumbitted by: TechnetiuM_
Grampa: This year will be the 3rd anniversary of his death. I was very close to him, and it still hurts me to know he's gone, and that I wasn't there when he died. I was at an international camp.
He died of bowel cancer, a disease currently affecting most of the male members of my family. He's missed by us all :(
Love you Grampa :(
Submitted by: Ice_Bitch
My grandmother passed away when I was 7(almost 8) in 1989.
I was young but I remember every single moment. I came down to the bathroom and saw her lying on the floor, she was still alive but could´nt talk or move. I ran to get my mom and told that had happened and she came straight away. She was rushed to the hospital and 12 hours later she died.
She had a stroke.
I remember my cousin crying and my mom trying to be strong for me and my siblings, keeping her tears in.
I remember when my mom came and told me that she had died, it felt like someone had took a knife and shoved it straight in my heart. I started to hit my mom telling her to take it back, I did´nt want to belive my nanna was gone, I could´nt. She was always there for me, she tought me how to read and write my name and always had a shoulder to cry on when I was bullied at school. My mom worked alot so I was always with my nanna. And loosing her was the like loosing a part of myself.
Still today when I think about her I cry, I still miss her deeply and sad over loosing her. But I´m grateful that she did´nt suffer much and that I did get to know and remember her.
Grandma, I love you and miss you and I know you are always there with me, watching over me and Gabríel.
Submitted by: xPorcelaineTearsx
Zeph: you we're once my love, i really never got over you, i can't believe its been 3 years since we spoke, since i last saw your face, Since i last saw you write i love you to me, Goddamn, why did you do it Zeph..Why? We we're together, i was mad at you, i shouldnt have said what i said, Im so sorry i feel the guilt everyday, i carry you on my shoulders Im So Sorry we couldnt have been together forever...and you shouldnt have done that on cam..i still have nightmares about it.
Johnathan(My Brother): i never knew you, you died before i was born, i always felt something missing in my life, maybe you we're it...I really wish i could of knowned you
Jake: Wonderful oh passionate Jake, you we're always there for me and now you're my angel in the sky, i still blame that fucking ass for drinking and driving, taking fucking too soon from us jake..TOO soon! I miss you boy, hope all is well..
Nathalie: Once my best friend, you should of came to me, i could of helped..you we're taken from your life too soon dear, i miss you everyday, i wish we could of talked about your problems..I wished, i should of gone to someone when i saw those scars, Nat ..Why did you leave me
Sumbitted by: beautiful_fucked_up_
My friend Vanna died last month in a car accident. Her and another kid i didn't know drowned to death when they accidentally drove into a river. The driver was way drunk (14-16 Budweisers), she was text messaging, it was dark and she didn't know the area, and the road had washed away during some of the storms we had this summer. I still can't believe she's gone, it's been almost a month and a half and i keep expecting her to show up smiling wearing her "Canoe butt" shorts (she was Native American). She was always a really smiley happy person and i don't think she had a mean bone in her body. She always went out of her way to say hello to people and make people smile. She always wore these ridiculous silver sparkley platform heels, even in the winter. I can't believe she's really gone.... we weren't best friends but I've known her since 6th grade (I'm in 11th now) and i can't imagine the world without her. I've never met anyone who loved life as much as her, she should have grown up to be someone who would have affected the world but she only got as far as my little bum fuck town. She was a week away from her 18th birthday. I miss that girl so much.
Grandpa: I miss him so much, it's been almost 6 years and it still hurts. Just writing this makes me want to cry. Thursday would have been his birthday. He was amazing. He was amazing. He was the world to my family. My grandma still isn't the same, she'll never get over it. They were married about 55 years, high school sweethearts. I miss his laugh and smile. I miss his big bear hugs and his silly wave (i loved his silly wave though) and how he always made everyone smile. My boyfriend never even got to meet him. They would have gotten along great, i know they would have. I really wish they could have met. And that my grandpa could see how happy Blaine makes me. I wanted him to see me get married and tell his silly jokes at our wedding. Life is so damn hard without him. I think everyone would be able to deal with everything going on right now easier if he was alive. (life definitely started taking a nose dive for my family right before he died. it's kind of evened out now but it still sucks) God, i miss him so much. It still hurts and it always will.
Sumbitted by: Neo_Zombie
Eric V. Dykes: This man was an alcoholic for about half of his life. He had a wife and two kids who he loved dearly. But he had a past he couldn't forget. Eric was my father. In the early years of my life he worked in a barber shop, I would go to work with him almost everyday. I loved being there and I say it's the main reason for my love of hair now. He began drinking more and more. His father passed away about a year before I was born and he could not handle it. He handled ALL of his problems with alcohol. When I was around 5, he lost the barber shop due to his drinking and not going to work. He did odd jobs then and we struggled. From the ages 7-11, he lived back and forth with us and his mother. At the age 11 we move out of my childhood home and he'd come to visit sometimes. He and my mother were planning a divorce, he didn't at all want it because he truly loved my mother. So, he stuck by her anyway she would let him. Eventually the divorce was settled and we moved from my hometown to Louisville. When we got here my mom stayed single for a year. Then she met Geoff. This broke my fathers heart. About a month later we were told he had Cirrhosis of the liver and that if he didn't stop drinking he would surely die. I figured he had lost his will to live, seeing as he lost his only love.He tried to stop for awhile and he let on that he was getting much better. Until around his birthday he was in and out of hospitals. He spent his 42nd birthday in a hospital bed at his mothers house. He didn't even recognize me, his little girl. The girl he was so proud to tell his friends about cause she looked just like him and acted like him too. We gave him a birthday card we had to read to him but we couldn't hold back tears. A month later we were told he was doing okay, that he was getting good treatment and his liver was going to hold out for many more years if he kept up with the treatment. Until one day in December 2005, I got a phone call from my sister... she was crying. She said that the doctors just gave my dad 24 hours to live. I had so many questions in my head, like how did he get SO bad so soon? We rushed over to see him and I couldn't stay in the room they had him in at my grandmothers. I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry, I wanted to talk to him. He opened his eyes once and looked at me. I wanted to grab him, to give him my life. Let him have a new start. He looked so pitiful and little. He made these noises called the death rattle and they STILL haunt me. A nurse gave him some shots that would keep him alive longer so there may be some chance to get him in a hospital to possibly save him. I had to leave that night to go on with my weekend. I kept telling myself he'd get through this considering he had already lived through so much. He had been stabbed in the chest, got into many car wrecks, fell through a window, done everything. I knew in my heart he'd get through it. That monday I was supposed to go back to school but I couldn't do it. I stayed home and got news that he'd be going to a hospital to hope for some sort of emergency surgery. I went through that day being hopeful waiting for more news. I went to bed that night to be woken up around 1:30 that night. My mom and sister came into my room tearful and told me he had died. All I could say was "He just... died?" I let on that I was fine as they went to bed. I teared up but never cried. When they went to bed I sat on the computer for a bit then I burst into tears. I couldn't function. I sat on the ground crying helplessly. I talked to him as if he could hear me and I wondered if I had treated him better, showed him more love that he would have stopped. I know I had the power to make him stop but I never used it cause I never thought he'd drink to the grave. The next few days were horrible. Visitations by people who knew him. All looking at me in pity. The girl who's father died from the bottle. I was surrounded with people but felt so alone. I almost wanted to stay by his coffin cause I expected him to wake up. When he was buried, I couldn't even believe it. In my heart and mind he is still here... telling me the things that he would have. I will never ever speak a bad word about him. He may of made the wrong choices but he loved my family. He loved my mother so much that he even bought her something to give to her before he died but never had the chance to tell us where it was. Although he is gone, I still talk to him, and I always will.
Submitted by: NoNotThisTime
Father;
He died when I was 10, kidney failure. I only found out last year that he liked the Smiths, Joy Division, the Cure etc. All the bands that I like that are old ish. It would be nice if he was still around because mother doesn't like what I've 'become' but I know father would have been interested.
Anyway, we were so close, every three days he would go to dailysis (Sp?) and come back at 7:30-8pm after a 3 hour dailysis and a hard days work before hand, he would come straight into the house, wash his hands and give me a back massage as I was already in bed sleeping, or waiting for him.
We shared the same birthday, he loved puzzles and we did this really huge 3D one together, I remember him and our stamp collecting days when we would sit down some weekends and look through staps while it was raining and mother would make us mini pancakes.
I bet mother is having trouble going through this as well, we aren't close so I can't really talk to her about it, but I know she misses her soulmate terribly. Because that is what they were, soul mates. They NEVER fought and were always smilling when they were with one another. Mother will never marry again.
I miss father so much.
Anthony Barlett Walsh
RIP <33
Ily
Submitted by: NoNotThisTime Sherilee
“She graduated last year from school as the sports captain.
I never really got to know her but she was always smiling, and working hard. She had great relationships with teachers.
On the sports dinners last year, I was the only one out o the school to receive the Volleyball Spirit Award, and she told me to keep going and always stay positive.
She was such an inspiration to many and her words have kept me motivated.
She died last night (1st May 2007). She had heart problems, everyone at school was so silent at the surprise assembly [as I'm told because I was home sick]. Her sister is in the grade above mine and suffers from the same heart condition.
Sherilee wasn't meant to die so soon but everyone knew it was coming some time.
May she RIP“
Submitted by:TheKillingGame Jamie:
“My family adopted her from a really poor family that couldn't support her when I was about eight years old. But before we did adopt her, her family didn't even have food to give to her and their house was in very poor condition... she was so happy to be with us. Her father had physically abused her and her mother could care less. My mother was like her mother and she was like the big sister I never had (she was thirteen at the time). We had so many good times together, and I was so close to the girl. She lived with us for about seven months before that next school day.
Jamie and I were walking home from school one day when we were crossing a street to get to my house. The signal said to walk and Jamie started to walk across the street, but I had to stop and tie my shoe so I waited for the next time I could cross the street. Jamie looked back and smiled at me, and I waved at her. Then all of the sudden a drunk driver turned the corner and hit her, sending her onto the concrete street. I remember somebody calling the ambulance and rushing her to the hospital, and I was left with my little sister to wait at home for my mom to come back from the hospital and tell us how she was doing.
She came back later that night and told me Jamie died from Brain Damage... and I felt so bad because I didn't go to the funeral. I still regret it to this day.
I miss you every day Jamie“.
Submitted by:MissOutOfMyWay Dad
“In 2000 On August the 24th, My dad died in a work accident.
It was about 4:30pm, and a apprentice came up to my dad and asked him if he could help with the truck the apprentice was working on.
My dad took a look at it and while he was checking it, some say the jack failed, and other people say he accidentally sat on th controls, but the jack came down, and so did the truck.
Craig (My Dad), was unable to get out in time and was squished.
Me and my mum found out 2 days later.
A policeman came to our house to tell us.
It was really sad.“
Submitted by:ApatheticEnthusiast My nana.
“She has cancer and didn’t tell anyone for a long time. By the time she did it was too late for her to make a full recovery. she was a chain smoker and an alcoholic but i loved her so much. when ever my parents fought i would call her and she would come get me and i would stay at her house for a few days. she fought that cancer for about 3 years until she had to stay in the hospital permanently. she was in hospital for Christmas. i remember the nurses putting decorations up and it made me so sad. after that they moved her to a home. i visited her twice there before she died. the last time i saw her they said she was really sick. i came in and said hello and them mum asked me to leave the room. i was 11 at the time and i sat out side and picked flowers, making all these stupid little prayers to who ever asking her to get better. then my brother walked off and went missing so we had to leave and find him. i forgot to say goodbye and just jumped in the car. the next morning she was dead.
ill always regret not saying goodbye. thats the bit that killed me the most.“
Submitted by:Broken-ILLusions Nils (used to be Deranged_Insanity at VF):
“He was a sweet boy of 18.
He got killed in an accident.
He was riding his bike when a truck hit him..
They tried to reanimate him but he died on his way to the hospital.
I will never forget him, even though I just knew him from the Internet.
Such things aren't right. It's just something everyone should remember.“
Submitted by:emovampir3 Nanny
“She was an amazing artist. Her notebook consisted of birds, nests etc. I will always remember her and love her lots. She was the most fantastic Nanny in the world. I still remember her letting me stay up till three in the morning, telling me I did great at supper even if I didn’t eat hardly anything (though her food was wonderful!), going swimming with me etc,.
Also when I got my snakebites, March 26th, I thought of what shed say. She wouldn’t mind them. She just loved us all.
She has breast cancer, survived that and devolved brain and spinal cancer + had several horrible heart attacks.
Im just glad shes not in any more pain, even though I miss her like hell.“
Submitted by:Lady_Solaire A girl
“a girl I knew casually that was best friends with one of my friends sisters passed away in the beginning of December. it was her, her 1 year old baby boy, and her uncle. it was deemed an electrical fire that took the house by storm. it was really sad. it still is sad to know she's gone. her baby was the sweetest. I wasn't able to go to her funeral due to work conflict. according to the funeral director over 2,000 people stopped by to pay their respects to them. he said that was the largest number he's ever seen pass through the door for a funeral.“
Submitted by:Android_in_void My Dad
“He passed away 4 years ago now. he died of cancer, it started in his lungs but spread out all over his body eventually. He smoked way too much almost all his life. He was my safe haven when my mother had drunk too much again. Better said: he was always my safe haven. My mum and him split up when I was about 6 years old, and he moved to an apartment close to my mother's home, so he wouldn't be far away from me. I stayed with both of them an equal amount of time a week.
I loved him so much. I didn't even realize that until he was gone. We had so much in common! Especially when it came to music and literature. He 'fed' philosophy to me when I was only 10 years old, he got me into the alternative music, just some examples.
Watching him grow weaker, thinner, dumber, less alive every day was the most painful thing I've ever lived through. He was in and out of hospitals and care centres for 8 months. When he was home I was supposed to take care of him. Which grew harder and harder, since I was only 14, struggling to make it through school without failing anything, and the cancer spread out to his brain. My smart, witty father had become a retard. Oh yes that sounded harsh and I didn't mean it that way, but it's just the truth. The last time he was home he was constantly on drugs, they said it was something stronger than morphine. He couldn't talk. he just sat on the couch. Staring emotionlessly at the tv. Sometimes mumbling something to me. I just wanted to cuddle up next to him but I was afraid. No one told me he was probably not even capable of going to the bathroom by himself. I was scared to leave for school, and with good reason. The second day he was home I found him on the ground of the living room in the morning, moaning.. I had no idea what had happened but it scared the hell out of me and I called for back-up. I cleaned up all the mess he had made, as far as I could, and waited for the people to arrive.
Then I went to school.. When I got home to my mother's, she told me dad had been admitted to a carecentre for terminal patients, and some lame-ass doctor had sincerely apologized to me for having gone through something that "traumatizing". His terrible mistake and blahblahblah. This is actually the first time I talked about it to anyone who wasn't involved. Actually, the first 2 years after he died I didn't even think about it once. I forgot all about it until my mum mentioned it one time.“
Rest in peace.
Submitted by:Zwitter My little brother
“On February 12th, 1992 my brother was born. There were complications but he survived 6 hours. His lungs were not all the way developed. He was put on a breathing machine but that wasn't even enough to keep him alive. I would of loved it if he had the chance to enjoy life, be with his family and everything else. He will always be in my heart as well as my family's hearts.“
Submitted by:SurgeonBeforeSurgery My Grandpa, William Micheal Kycia Senior
“He died when I was 3, but I still remember him and I miss him like you wouldn't believe. He took care of me as if I was the last little girl in the world. He would spoil me with whatever I wanted and even though he was 63, he would get on the ground and "wrestle" with me. (And of course, he would let me win, Bless his heart).
Unfortunately, he smoked. A lot. I remember the last time I saw him. I was about to leave his house and he was going to take one of his daily naps. He looked especially tired if I remember correctly. He also looked really sad when I had to go. I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek and wished him good-bye and my mom said that I said "I'll see you again, right?" It was oddly coincidental. He nodded his head and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
When he went in for his nap, he never woke up. He had a heart attack in his sleep. At least he went in peace...
I have a younger brother who was born when I was seven. It pains me when I think that he won't ever know my grandfather. He was a great man. Every time I visit his grave I cry. I miss him so much. I love you, Grandpa. RIP. <3“
