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ABOUT TEXT HERE SOMETHING GRIM Hello and welcome to my profile.I have written two profiles,both for this website(vampirefreaks)but neither profile was really about myself.Not about who I am. Now I'm not sure if there is any real way that I could show you or explain to you;even begin to explain to you about who I am.So I've decided to make this simple.Of course nothing is that simple but sometimes complex things have simple solutions. So I am applying this to my profile.

THE DAWN OF HORRORPHILIA My name is Davide Nixon.I was born in Pheonix Arizona and I was raised in Tennessee since I was four.I write horror stories and I have ever since the first grade.I pretty much apply everything to the horrific ,and I don’t necessarily believe everything horrific to be negative. But I will not get into my views and beliefs on what I necessarily find to be good or bad or an opposition on what I think is good or bad.Mostly because I have mixed views on this subject and to speak in opposition of either would cheapen me in my so-called philosophical views that I find relevant or fitting at this point in my life. I am easily impressed and sometimes easily shocked and overwhelmed.I love peoples creative sides and everyone has one.They might not put it to use in the way that I do and most people probably wouldnt want to,but most if not all are creative on a dark,scary sort of level.They create fights/wars,they create whole semi-psychotic personas that they try to live up to.But I've read that everyone does this when theyre children.A self created identity ,it help us differentiate ourselves from our parents and our siblings.Its such a sad fickle thing to know that we had to create ourselves based on others to become an individual person.But it is semi-psychotic,which is good. I could go on and on about how people are creative on a dark level and I'm sure that I'm not that first to come to this idea.

Is this the rationalizing of a 23 year old bored man who writes twisted tales.A 23 year old who still plays on vampirefreaks with the little teenie-boppers.One who despises the premise of this place;putting a number value on your face and on your soul.Shouldnt this be a place of anti value,a place where none of societies "everything has a price and value" slogan goes out the window.Because we're rare spooky individual rebels who identify with being goth and/or edgy.Down with edginess and down with the individual.And yet there is such a clinging for acceptance ,for 10s,for attention.-And this used to be my opinion.It still is to some degree.

You see I was top rated on this site for a whole summer when I was twenty years old.Then I left for a while on a month vacation and my ratings dwindled .The "envious" gave me 1s and my friends still gave me tens.When I came back after a month I became top rated again and several times after that. But I didnt care. 'Those people just want to fuck me' I thought, 'and the rest of them just want a little piece of what they imagioned me to be;socially accepted rebel notoriety ,on a piddly little website full of kids. Needless to say I found a way to leave vampirefreaks and my throne on the most rated boys list and replaced this by running into the arms of a narcissistic bitch.Well I knew that that wouldnt please me so I came back to vampirefreaks.When neither one together pleased me I left both. I'm not sure if it was right,maybe I should have stuck around,been a really good friend.I could have hung around on vf for my friends, but I had to find what I enjoyed. And it was creating my stories;having horrific and strange visions.I had missed this and I had never found a balance before.And now I have found a few balances.I write and I love to have dreams and nightmares.I have taught myself how to play the piano,the organ,and the cello and I play them well.I can solve mensa game puzzles without even trying ( I've leaned that your first thought is always right,but isnt your first thought always right for anything ,if only you had trusted yourself-sort of thing.)And I am finding more and more things about myself and my capabilities. I think perhaps this is some of the reason I have come back to vf,to show some of myself once and for all.Well that and I do miss talking to certain people.You see my only friend moved away last year when my sister and him broke up,so I'm sort of friendless now.But that part is fine,I still have my family,my mother who is a great person(shes sometimes spooky) and my brother who is a teenager ,is one of the greatest kids that I know.He is here on vf under the name .I had a bad opinion about teenagers before him . I thought that all male teens were loud mouth little shits and all female teens were little whores.See, two teenage girls lied to me about their age so I could be their little boyfriend,and it didnt happen . And no offense but I don’t care how mature that you act or how big that your boobs are,if you are under twenty,your still very young and there is an emotional matureness that only comes with age(if ever.) But my brother is a good kid,he likes skateboarding and horror movies and he likes my horror stories.Though I do think that my sister and him get bit creeped out by them,and this is so very good.

HORRORPHILIA Perhaps I've been trying to go around a subject that I've been dying to talk about,the subject of horror and my own horrorfying fantasies. You see as a child I used to have the most frightening dreams.Night after night I would have dreams about large black dogs that would chase and stalk me.And I would have dreams about strange looking people that tried to bury me.The dreams came so frequent that I sort of got used to them.The black dogs were still irritable but they didnt chase me as much.And the strange looking people were actually my friends in one dream.And I had a series of dreams when I was a child where these people would come out of nowhere and grab me and then take me off into the darkness.Everything would go black and then I'd wake up,this dream occurred all the time when I was little.And I got used to them even.In one of these dreams the people told me theyd give me ten minutes to watch tv before they came to get me. Getting used to the horrific began early with me(you never really get used to it).One of my first memories ,which was a strange one,was during a tape recording and a movie.I was a hyperactive child so my mother would play recordings of the jungle/forest and light music in the back ground , to calm me down.She played me one of these recordings during a horror movie called "Day of the Dead" a George Romero zombie movie.And as I watched and listened to them both in unison,I did indeed calm down.I thought she had played a horror movie for me to calm down to.And even though she didnt,and I know this now,it still feels like that. I have a few ideas for stories and books.I have many stories in my head and I am writing them more and more.I have published a few stories and I have entered one in a contest that will announce the winners on Halloween. One night I had a dream where I was looking at a childrens book of some sort.Well it was made like a childrens book;with large pictures on top and then a sentence or two at the bottom.But the book was strange.All of the pictures in the book were of dead people.You could tell that they were dead by their eyes.They had that blank lifeless stare.One of the pictures was of a little girl .The text at the bottom read: "This is Cindy and she is wearing a pretty pink dress".When I turned the page there was a picture of a dead dog.It was taxidermic and was standing up.The text bellow its picture read: "This is Cindys dog Brutus.They are the same age." When I woke up my first thoughts were-who would write a book like this and in what world would such a book exist?It creeped me out so much that I wanted to write a story about it.But then I put the story a side and I thought: Maybe I would write a book like this.Maybe this would be that world.So I have decided to write them,as of now I have anyway.I want to call them- "My Little Grey Books". A title written in a mundane childrens book fashion.Of course only the most mundane people would read them but thats fine. I do have gentler stories in my collections.I've even written three love stories-well you could call them love stories,I guess;kinda. I want my first collection of stories to be called Horrorphilia.I want it to be in three or four volumes and I've named it Horrorphilia ,consciously because although some of the stories arent necessarily "horror" ,they still have a horrific element to them.Philia:proned to be or leaning towards and then horror:an intense feeling of fear or dread - Horrorphilia . Well ,I thought it sounded charming and exotic.

LIKES HERE Horror,horror movies;books;pictures-well anything to do with horror,coffins,graveyards,the paranormal,ghost,zombies,werewolves,vampires,old vampire legends,old churches,old castles, victorian houses, colonial houses,victorian surgery books,open wounds-when I was a child I had one on my leg that looked like lips with red lipstick,red lipstick,black lipstick,old metal coffins,mostly old dead corpses:men women and children,opera but I like classical music more with just the music and no singing,human teeth,dog teeth,human skin, cannibalism ,brain eating pertaining to any mammal ,rabbits,guenia pigs(mostly cream colored ones),persian cats,black lace,black leather/pleather/ vinyl ,eating monkey brains,some victorian clothes and jewlrey ,Mutter museum,human eyes, empty eye sockets, the look of drowned people, a certain amount of pride in people, confidence, the look of stitches, the look of something rotted,dresses,long finger nails,old folklore,antiques,antique dolls(french,german)serial killers that play around with human innards ,Albert Fish,Dalmer,deformed people(sometimes) WRITERS: Thomas Ligotti, Ramsey Cambell, Poppy Z. Brite, Nietzsche, Hermann Hesse, The Marquis de Sade, Clive Barker, Goethe, Dante, Dickens, Ernest Hemingway, H.P.Lovecraft,E.A.Poe,Robert Aickman, Villy Sorensen, David Case and I sometimes like Stephen King ,F.Paul Wilson ,Tanith Lee, Anne Rice, and Dan Simmons and tons of others.I would write about why I love all of these writers but it could take a while so perhaps later. I love art and I used to be artisically inclined when I was younger but all of my passion and energy is put in on my writing now but my love for art has not went away,here are a few artists that I like:Salvador Dali , H.R. Giger, Hieronymus Bosch, Paul Delvaux , da Vinci, Michelangelo , and sometimes Van Gogh, Jackson Pollock and others. And a few obsecure people that I like for their work or for the quirky people that they are: Edward Gorey,Count Eric Stienbeck, my mother, Tim Burton , Bela Lugosi, Barbara Steele, Johnny Depp, Jack Nicholson , Dario Argento , Philip K. Dick ,William Defoe , and others

DISLIKES HEREAny propaganda,sell advertisements especially the ones with sexually subliminal messages-a little mind fucking is okay but you know-too much of anything ,right?,kids are annoying,so are a lot of teenagers,sticky things,when people cut their hair over and over-its not going to look any better,porn is gross,the word cute,cute things.cute people-etc.,most things contemporary -music;people;mentalities;culture,any activism-get a life,I don’t like sluts or whores but I've wanted to fuck a couple,knowing that I didnt trust my first instinct,myspace-its like the mall-too many people,people that talk all the time and say "Oh,I hardly ever talk to people" ,relating things-hypocritical statement in itself, people that cling to ideas, when social statistics show themselves to be true(i.e. low,working ,and middle class societies group and will itself into stereotype) ,any group or class of people-this is an illusion and so are most ideals dear to societies heart: religion,values,freedom,but I don’t wish to get into any of my philosophical meanderings that I've taken from Nietzsche and Vaihinger that appealed and made sense to my intellectual and mundane level of sensibility that I have-although I do admit that these things;love;values etc.-are beneficial in ways;one being that a lack of this would lead to a certain amount of chaos;but it doesnt mean that I have to like it ,and I dislike mice.

MUSIC HEREgoth,classical,metal