I belive I can't juge myself and therefore I won't.
what am I?.. yeh if I knew that I probobly wouldnt have found this site at all. Mix a goth with a punk, add some computermaniacness and normal weirdness. On top of that you could put christianity and disgust for state church and the pope.. Hmm what have we got? the answear is me, whatever that is...
"I fear neither living nor dead, only myself. Cause I don't know whitch of the two I am"
-Me (oki quoting myself here, thats stupid -_-)
Am goth, not like wearing all black listens to depressive music goth, well I do some of that to but it's not what makes me a goth. Am more like the original term of the word, if you don't know what I mean take a look at my second link. I know who I am, but not what. thats the one question I might never get an answear to, but still I can't stop asking it. Norway is like one of the best countries to live in. And I am a lucky girl compared to most people in this damn world, but still... I keep asking myself for a reason to it all. For what purpose do I live? Why am I here? stuff like that, maybe I got some "Sokrates blood" in my veins or something. I dunno, I just keep whondering. Am christian, not like going to church every sunday never swearing and praying before each meal christian. Yuk!! More like that I know it in my heart that it is the thing for me, but still. The bible dosn't answear all my questions. It's like there is some things we are not supposed to know. Yet i want to know them all. Hmm.. being both christian and goth sounds kinda contradicting, but really it's not. At least not if you know what they mean. Ofcourse, if all knowledge you have is those rumors that so many hold to be the truth, than well.. ur bad sucker! I think I am anything but a stereotype. Being christian, goth and all the other things I am, tells me what I am, but it won't give a defentition of who. So i whonder.. how can you tell who you are? Is a name the only thing we can use to define ourselfs, to tell one from another? Oki am being deep here, lolz school has that affect on me. weather it is good or not I got no clue of.
Never clamied to be better
I did not write a self-glory letter
Here I stand
nothing I demand
Can you handle my truth?
the one of a minds eternal youth
Am just another lost little kid
trying to understand.
Don't pitty me, there's noting morbid
not knowing the purpose of man.
Am I so different?
I'll say no
Am I so special?
I'll say no.
Am just simply me
whatever that migth be
My poetry collection on Zenhex (if u wanna read more)
I'm in no ways the kinda person who you could know all about after a few days. I'm just to complicated. My life has always been complicated, different.. For good and bad really. I don't know my dad at all.. he lives like a 20min drive away, but has never been a father to me. My stephdad died of cancer some years ago and now I'm living alone with my mom and Rex. Heh.. I consider myself lucky really, now don't believe I'm looking for pitty, cause am not. Everyone has a past right? I'm reluctant to inform much about mine to just anyone. Could probobly write a 300 pages book than, but who the fuck would bother to read all that? At the time being I just try to get as much as possible out of life. Just enjoy and live on. Life is short, there's no reason to spoil it.
If you need to ask me if I'm being rude, the answer will most likely be yes.
I don't consume alcohol, for reasons you may only guess
I'm a nice girl, untill you cross that line...
When in a bad mood, I occationally chocke people without warning or reason.
I love sarcasm, if your being sarcastic with me I'll reply in the same manner. You say: "I'll kill you!" I'll inform you that I expect red roses in my funeral.
I value honasty over politeness, you ask me what I think about that new sweater, I'll tell you EXAGTLY what I think about it.
I find ignorance to be the plague of modern times, one I'm trying hard to escape. (wheater this escape is successfull or not I'm not sure).
I love guys that can make me laugh.
I'm trying hard not to be superficial, in this superficial world.
I love attention, but no I'm not gonna steal it all from you.
I'm good at keeping secrets for 2 reasons: 1. I don't gossip and spread rumors, 2. I forget half of what is said anyways.
And than I should add, I've got a terrible memory.
Philosophy of moi
Righte, I've got some pretty strong, and perhaps disturbing opinions of this world. I strongly believe this world as we know it is not a final place, but a temporary one. I don't look for solutions, but I see trouble. I see man's self inflicted destruction. I see we cast eachother into fire and burn together casting blame upon our neighbours or God.
We're a funny kind of creatures. Make ourselfs kings of the world, claim our kin to be better then that of any other "lower" creatures. And, I think we were, but.. not anymore. Conceitedness, ignorance, and foul acts, it has made us lesser beings. I see not halos above our heads. There are demon wings growing out of our backs now. I assume not all who spends their time on VF finds that a bad thing. After all, you are what you make youself. And if it's a demon you wish to be, well I'm not the one who's gonna stop you.
Call me crazy if you will, or supersticious if that would please you more. I franckly couldn't care less. I got my faith, and it should be clear by now what that is, lest the overhall picture. The Divine exists, I have felt it. I have seen it. And it makes me no more special then anyone else. No I wont at any rate attempt to turn you over or anything of the like. Belief is only true if it's something you choose for youself.
Special thanks to for allowing the use of this drawing, and to let me and anyone else color it.
What I like... Poetry, kinda addicted to making poems.. lolz maybe I should start taking notes in class... hmmm take a look at the link up there,(it should be quite hard not to notice) it's to my poetry collection on Zenhex. Which has becomed quite big. Just love making poems there. I love all kinds of arts really, but in addition to poetry, drawing and music is what I cherish the most. Turkish guys.. yeh I got a weakness for them. Free minded people, who accept me for what I am. People who stand out from the crowd, who has their own opinions. Who are wise and challenge my mind. I like it when others say something which makes me think. Lasagne..yummy, hehe.
You are the Undying Artist. Moody, erratic, and
empassioned, you find art in the darkness. You
cultivate dark beauty and dark artists to
surround yourself and drink of the song in
Smoking.. yak!! kissing a smoker is disgusting (yes I talk from experience). Stereotypes, labeling, and anything else which is given a name before beeing tasted. Posers. I mean, if you have a need to be something, at least be uself, cause if you act and pretend to be something your not, well, thats when your truly nothing at all. Airheads who think they r worth something just beceuse they look good, when really... there is not a single valuable thought inside their pretty heads. Pollution and the way humans are "taking care" of this planet. People who abuse children or animals, or make money on drugs or human trafikking. Guns, a cowards weapon of choice. Math x.x it's not hard but so damn boring :(
Your inner soul is calling for help! You always
seem so depressed, lonely, and feel like an
outsider. You may have a cold, sad exterior,
but in all reality you are hurt inside and
bottling up all of your anger. Everyday you
wonder why are you still here when there is
nothing left? You use to once be a happy,
loving soul, but it was damaged by 'them' and
seems like it never can be fixed again.
However, you have yet seemed to realize that
there are people out there that deeply care for
you. They secretly have a thing for you because
they find you to be dark, mysterious, and full
of secrets, not to mention being the prettiest
person in the world! You like to enjoy your
time by yourself expressing your feelings
through forms of art, and enjoy nice quiet
scenaries that just dazzle your mind with awe.
Your bedroom is basically your sanctuary where
you can hide out, hidden from those who gave
you all of the pain. Try to loosen up and have
some fun! Never start frowning because you
never know who's falling in love with your
Genie in a bottle or drama queen, I'm abit of everything and perhaps nothing at all aswell. There has been many ups and downs in my life this last year. Things that has made me look differently not only at myself, but at the entire world. Even at exsistance itself. I'm not of importance in the larger picture, really.. very very few of us are at all. Yet if you can affect someone else even slightly in a positive matter life itself is a gift. Perhaps not to youself, but to that other person it can be. Not sure if what I'm writing now makes much sence to anyone, and really.. that dosn't matter much to me. This is a profile right? Meaning a conceited thing to make, a webpage of the most self centred kind that exists. Hence the place I have chosen to let out all of my conceited self :p Slightly to keep me from pooring it all out on the unwilling victims that I see on a daily basis, slightly cause this is a place for it and here it is, for reasons I don't quite understand somewhat appreciated and most certainly rewarded. Though my profile dosn't remind much of me anymore so most likely I will be doing further changes and adding to it in the time to come.
REX the Great:
This is Rex my little boy!
Rex is my guinapig, now no one dare call him pig or pet or thing he is REX!! oki got it? Kthx :p Rex is soon 5 years old, (or in the mid-20s of guineapig-years). He is what I would call a free animal. His cage is always open and he can walk around in all the house, never has he walked so far he couldn't take another step.
Likes: salad, carrots and most other vegetables, long walks into the kitchen and getting attention.
Dislikes: being alone, food out of reach, having to do lotsa tricks like a circus animal to get the treats.
Favorite music: The cd-player is next to my cage, I listen to everything Firena does.
Don't mess with Rex, he has a hard punch!!!
Listen to alot really.. some gothick metal.. hard rock, pop-rock, celtick, 80s rock and so on... Type O Negative, Within Temptation, Nightwish, Placebo, Linkin Park, Opeth, Midnattsol, Iron Maiden, Killswitch Engage, Carlos Santana, Stone Sour, Eric Clapton, Epica, Incubus, Goo Goo Dolls, Saliva, Nickleback, Dream Therater, Epica, Extol, Pink Floyd, Queen, Papa Roach, Guns'n Roses, Slipknot, HIM, Dc Talk, Alice Cooper, Kasabian, Deftones, Muse, Murderdolls, Godsmack, Enya, Celldweller, Gregorian, Hammerfall and alot of other stuff really... just give me songs with lyricks that has some meaning to it.
As I'm making changes here I hope you will visit my little profile again soon. Untill than, just keep your eyes open to what is out in this world. Yeah that's right.. On the other side of the door you usually only pass to get more food at the closest grocery shop. Untill than, go explore and take advantage of some of the possibillities you are fortunate enugh to have instead of lingering in a dark corner where the only light to brighten up your dark hours is the one beaming at you from this very screen you read from now. Untill than, I bid thee farwell