I guess I'm a nice person, I know I'm way to shy, plus lazy. Everyone has there flaws I suppose. I choose to see the best in people, even though not all people are great, I sure had my fill of assholes and dumb fucks this year. I also lost to many friends, but who cares, they sure didn't. It always seems whenever I need someone they all just abandon me, It kinda funny how it all falls through. I just don't care, I don't know what happened to me. I lost myself along the way. I ask myself that everyday "What happened to me?". I can't believe I led myself this way in life. It's such a disappointment to my friends, and even to myself. When I was younger I promised I wouldn't be this way, but look at me now. I'm everything I always feared, but it's not as bad as I always thought. I have much more self confidence now, but just a different scene, friends, and personality. I'm still considered as a 'sweet girl' but the ones who use to love me, gone. I do miss quite a few people. Great friends really, I wish they would come back, I never meant to hurt any of them, on purpose. We all make mistake, but mine are unforgivable. I just wish I could look in the mirror and see myself, instead on this monster I turned into. Where's the kid I use to be? Whatever happened to innocence? I miss the good old days, when we didn't want get high, or have sex. When jealously was over who had the bigger ice cream. I hate these times, the new generation. I always hear "Things will get better." or "It's always darkest before dawn." Well I been in pitch dark for years now. I want to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I want to have a family who is actually there for each other. I want so much that I can't have or change. I guess in the end everything will be back to normal, and the world will be right. I just hope the end comes soon. Until then, I'll just take in deep breaths and realize, this is my life.