What can I tell you about myself? I love the Gothic subculture but I don't get much of a chance to meet other Goths, which is why I joined VF. I go to a school where to be Goth or Emo is considered a sin in itself, and I don't really care what people there think of me but I miss talking to people who I can relate to :( I am desperately lonely so pleeease, show me some affection!! I'd much rather an insightful inbox message than a pic comment, and I'm willing to give my msn address once I get to know you.

I am 168 cm tall (sorry to all you guys who don't measure things in centimetres, but I don't know how many feet I am), I weigh 50 kg and apparently have the perfect hip-to-waist ratio (0.7). I have very long, curly chestnut hair that falls past my waist, hazel coloured eyes (as you can see from my pic) and I'm very pale because my mother is Irish. Some people say I have an American accent. My star sign is Taurus.

Some of you may think this to be very superficial of me, but I admire beauty and see it in almost everything. This does not mean that I am anti-ugly, or if you're sexy I will like you. I am just more attracted to pretty things than most people...Anyway I love art, music, drama, literature, film, pretty much anything creative...in case you hadn't already guessed, yes I am a romantic ♥

I play the semi-acoustic, acoustic and electronic violin, and compose violin music sometimes. I hope there are some people on VF who appreciate Gothic instrumental music, if you do I'd really like to talk with you :)

I love art, especially surrealism. Most of the time I sketch fashion designs, models from Gothic Beauty magazines and landscapes, like cemeteries. I'm best with watercolour and charcoal.

I am also fascinated by the occult and Satanism, although I am not a Satanist or a "witch". I am not a religious person - I believe that in the past, religions were invented to explain occurences and other such things that science is now capable of explaining today. However I will not discriminate against you if you are religious, although I actually think fundamentalists of any religion are dangerous.

Socially, I am awkward, bordering inept. Having conversations with strangers, aquaintances I don't know very well or anyone who isn't a close friend is physically stressful and exhausting for me. I'm serious, I actually tire from trying to hold conversations. I almost never use the telephone, I very much prefer texting. I do not trust anyone completely. Do not take offence to this, I simply cannot do it. I won't allow myself to be dependent on any one thing, be it an object, a pet or a person. If you've read my FAQ then you've probably realised that my hatred of socialising is produced by the same incident in my past that produced my distrust and distaste of most men.

I am currently in a long-term relationship with my boyfriend Mike. I don't think I've ever gotten on so well with a boy as I have with him. I never become bored with him, he's intelligent AND handsome. He seems to be one of a dying breed of real "gentlemen" in today's society.
If Mike and I ever break up, I doubt I would date anyone again. I typically do not want either "meaningful" relationships or random hook ups; I'm much happier being independent of others. Mike seems to be the only exception to this.

From life I want all the wild beauty and passion that today's youth seems to eagerly dismiss for drink, drugs and promiscuity. I want to find it in the landscape, in nature, in devotion, in Michael. I want the extreme contrast between silence and music, between violent motion and utter stillness. I want to skip and scream my way through time and space, through a clouded and deserted dreamscape. I want all the elements to affect me at once. I want to articulate myself exquisitely. I want to be free.
I don't need drugs to get high.

My pet yabby:
Her name is Wench. Why, you ask? Because she basically halved my other yabby, Humbert Humbert, thus causing him to DIE. She cut off 3 legs and 1 claw, so I think she deserves that name. Maybe she's just a feminist *shrug*

My violin:
My main form of expression. I play everything from Bach to the violin solos of Naio Ssaion and Emilie Autumn (I usually have to teach the more popular/rock pieces to myself because there's almost no sheet music available). I have been likened to Emilie Autumn by quite a few people on VF and I assure you I'm not some extremist fan trying to be her. I only recently discovered her music, and although I admire her and think her to be very talented, my own compositions are very different to hers.

Art:
Especially by Edvard Munch, Salvador Dali, Mark Ryden, Joseph Vargo, H.R. Giger and Goya. I love all forms of expressionism.

Modelling:
I don't plan on doing it professionally, but it's so easy and I get paid well (sometimes in chocolate :) ). In my photos I strive for elegance, a trait that I really admire.

Sewing/Making clothes:
I make a lot of my own clothes, collectable voodoo dolls, bags, etc. The clothes featured in the "Gothic Lolita/Doll" modelling folder were designed and made by me. My distrust of...well, pretty much everything and everyone, extends to include my sewing machine (hence I never use it). I sew everything by hand, and all my designs are my own. Fun fun fun.

Herbal teas/Red Bull sugarfree:
I cannot stand drinking plain water, it bores me to tears, which defeats the purpose of me drinking. I love mint, chamomile and jasmine tea (lol no I'm not a hippy, I just don't like black tea very much) As for Red Bull sugarfree, best non-alcoholic drink ever!!! Sure it's giving me osteoparosis or however you spell it, but it's so orgasmic for the tastebuds!

Guys who have the balls to wear makeup:
Any guy who can put on makeup well and wear it in public immediately has my respect. I've found that guys who take the time to learn how to apply makeup properly are usually the same guys who take the time to help me out in times of trouble...and there are many of those :P

The whole concept of "Emo":
Not because it is a crappy imitation of Gothism but because it pretty much pokes fun at depression, which is actually a serious mental disorder caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. I have friends who were seriously depressed and it's not very helpful when shitheads ask them if they can borrow their razorblade.

Heat/the Sun:
More to the point, which Goth DOES like heat or the sun?

Fundamentalists of ANY religion:
I hate people who try to impose their views on others. I went to a fundamentalist Christian primary school, so I have a lot of experience with them...what a bunch of fruitcups.

Country/jazz music:
In my opinion, all country music is either slow and draining or reminds me of drought-striken farmers with nothing better to do than sit on their porch and complain about lost loves. Jazz music just makes me so ANGRY, all that syncopated rhythm is agonizing to listen to.

Guys who ask me if I have a webcam:
So many guys have repeatedly asked me this and the answer is NO I do not have a webcam and even if I did, I would not be willing to show you my tits. You're wasting your time if that is your motive for adding me on MSN.

Guys I've never met who ask me very personal questions on MSN:
I've had a lot of experience with this recently, so for all the guys who intend on adding me on MSN just to ask stupid questions like "Would you flash in public?" or "Would you kick a guy in the balls while he's wanking?", DON'T BOTHER. I am only allowed a limited number of contacts on MSN, and I'm not going to waste a contact place on sex-orientated idiots.