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BehindYou

Don't fuck with me. I'm on the payroll.
Status: They be takin' my single status!!!
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BehindYou
Me building my interpretation of Stone Henge Goggles/collar I made for cyborg Cybertron First session (fresh) Shitty pic of finished tat My crowning achievement in life: The Sand Vagina
[ View Image Gallery (51 pics) ]

Sex: male
Age: 24
Location: New York, New York, United States
Orientation: Straight
Married to: evilvenus666
Rating: 10.00
Rating points: 10
Member since: February 04, 2005
Last logged in: August 10, 2014, 06:08am
Account Status: Premium Member
Rated by: 1 people

Profile:

Sex: w/ Wife Only
Age: 7
Location:West Harlem, NYC, NY
Member since: February 4th 2005
Sexual Orientation: Erect
This user is cheating death.
Occupation:Waiter/Soldier
Married to evilvenus666
Religious views: Cult of The Sub-Genius
Damage: 6.0221415 x 10ēģ[?]

"Im smart in that Bruce Willis sort of way."
***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** The number one cause of death among humans is still dying. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** 4 out of 5 dentists agree: Hitler is bad for teeth. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Internet Cleanup day is coming up next Thursday. Make sure to unplug your computer and disconnect it from the internet on that day to avoid data loss. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Middle finger still considered viable means of conveying anger. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Fuck the police, comin' straight from the underground! ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Satan still upset about that whole "God" thing. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Eating babies still considered immoral in some countries. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Why you may keel over and die within the next half hour. More on that story in an hour. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Epilepsy or new dance craze? You decide. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Someone still loves you, Boris Yeltsin. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Barry White, Mama Cass, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.: Once fat, still famous, always black. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Let's get off moms because I just got off yours. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Berries and cream. Berries and cream. I'm a little lad who loves berries and cream. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Somebody left the cake out in the rain. Oh no! I was gonna eat that cake, but now it's all wet and I don't think I want any. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Middle finger still considered viable means of conveying anger. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Black Entertainment Television is the worst thing I've ever seen. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Chili cheese dogs may look like a diarrhea covered penis on a bun, but I assure you, they're quite delicious. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Regardless of what you think of Micheal Moore from a political, ethical, our journalistic perspective, you have to admit that he's not a very attractive man. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** If erection persists for more than for hours, contact every female you know who isn't a blood relative. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** OH DEAR GOD! It's stuck in the fucking dishwasher again! Honey, quick, get me a hex wrench and some butter! ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** A wood chuck would chuck exactly 2.18 cords of wood per week, were it not just a groundhog. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** A recent study shows that: Your face!!! Ooooo! Burn! ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** And Sean Connery is in the lead with Zero dollars. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** A dingo ate my baby. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Shave and a haircut; two bits. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Courtney Cox, I love you. You're so hot, on that show. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** America: 1 Everyone else: 0 ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Now with 30% less fat than regular potato chips. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** What do you mean we've been canceled!?!? You wait until my agent hears about this! ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** This is Bill Johanson, Tits McGee has the night off. ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Holy jell-o pudding pops Batman, Bill Cosby is a Racist! ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Well, I guess OJ really didn't do it... ***BehindYou's Scrolling News*** Fibonacci Sequence! 01123581321345589144233377610987159725844181676510946177112865746368750251213931964183178115142998320401346339217837935247185703097922781514930912...
"Those who have the least to say will use the most words to say it."

The Dinosaurs went extinct because you touch yourself.
  • I'm sarcastic, defiant, and not always so friendly.
  • I'm hypocritical, contradictory, and can be somewhat ill-tempered.
  • I find that those feelings which are best, are those which are felt least.
  • I'm a mutt.
  • I Love shiny things...
  • I hate Emos.
  • I have a rather strong distaste for myself.
  • Ska music is just okay.
  • If you've read this far, I'm impressed.
  • I don't have too many friends because frankly, I hate stupidity and it seems to be a pandemic these days.
  • What friends I do have are really important to me. But then again, that's what makes them friends. Without value, they'd just be acquaintances.
  • I've been made 2 signs in the history of this VF acct.
  • The quickest way to my heart is through my stomach.
  • The quickest way to my pants it through my heart.
  • You probably don't want to go in my pants anyway.
  • Odds are, if you do, you're not the kind of person I want in my pants...
  • The 10 commandments of Awesome
    The following are the holiest of the many laws of Awesome, handed down from on high by the one true God of Awesome, Bruce Campbell:

    1. I am the God of Awesome, which have brought thee out of the land of confusion, out of the house of fools. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Capische?

    2. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy Awesome in vain.

    3. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of anything that is in emo whining, or that is in the Juggalo encouraging, or that is in the Kindergoth promoting. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them.

    4. Remember the Abbath day, to keep it Awesome.

    5. Honor thy Chainsaw and thy Boomstick: that thy days may be Awesome.

    6. Thou shalt Remain awesome in thy ways, thy words, and thy food preferences.

    7. Thou shalt not commit non-awesomeness.

    8. Thou shalt not listen to Alan Jackson.

    9. Thou shalt commit a jihad on anything which is guilty of non-awesomeness on 3 strikes.

    10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything that is thy neighbor's...especially his ass!

    Psychotic Rant
    The entirety of this situation gets soggy in milk. It Just can't stand up to the example set by other cereals. When cross-eyed chicks with just okay bodies model latex, erections face a bear market. As my favorite Cardinal once told me,"Stick this candle in your ass or Jesus will never love you!" I suppose in this particular instance Jesus was a metaphor for a date tree. There's something here that's rotten to the core. It wasn't me! It was the one-armed man. Don't you know who I am? I'm the one-armed boxer! I killed seven in one blow. Bring us a shrubbery! That's your answer to everything! He hated having her watch him eat a French breakfast. Like masturbation you do things to the bread that other people shouldn't know about. I suppose though that in the end they did get married anyway, despite his being not but a lowly haberdasher's apprentice.
    I sometimes worry that I'm a figment of my own imagination.
  • Cinema
    Equilibrium
    Quills
    Children of Men
    Neighbor No. 13
    The Ladies' Man
    The Fountain
    Blazing Saddles
    Memento
    A Clockwork Orange
    Half Baked
    Everything Is Illuminated
    Dark City
    Sin City
    District B-13
    The Machinist
    Any of the Zatoichi Flicks
    Yojimbo!!!
    Full Metal Jacket
    El Mariachi
    Both Ace Ventura Movies
    Dumb and Dumber
    Friday
    Pulp Fiction
    I Am Legend
    Walk Hard
    There Will Be Blood
    Perfume
    The Fifth Element
    Taxi Driver
    Leon: The Profesional

  • Music
    Adema
    Adiemus
    Anna Moffo
    Aphex Twin
    Assemblage 23
    Bach
    The Bad Brains
    Beatallica
    The Beatles
    Beethoven
    The Benedictine Monks of Santo Domingo
    The Birthday Massacre
    Bjork
    Bob Marley
    Body Rockers
    Bran Van 3000
    Chris Vrenna
    Combichrist
    Daft Punk
    Dragonforce
    Dropkick Murphys
    Eminem
    Flogging Molly
    Gorillaz
    Happy Hardcore
    Fatboy Slim
    Ice Cube
    Johnny Cash
    Kosaka Riyu
    Beastie Boys
    The Latch Brothers
    Ludachris
    mc chris
    Nine Inch Nails
    NWA
    Scapegoat Wax
    Scatman John
    Sean Paul
    Snoop Dogg
    Tenacious D
    They Might Be Giants
    Wagner
    Wierd "Al"
    Yoko Kanno

  • On Paper
    1984
    Animal Farm
    Don Quixote
    Sex: A Man's Guide
    JTHM
    DMZ
    Dragon Hunter
    Chobits
    Greek Mythology
    A People's History of the US (1492-present)
    Civil Disobedience
    A Farewell to Arms
    Hunt For the Zero Point
    Shakespearian plays
    Campaigns of a Non-Combatant
    The works of the late Dr. Seuss


  • "Fuck your rasins."


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