Its as if my soul were sucked from my being
My organs taken from my body, and burnt to
ash...
My heart, still beating ripped from my chest,
and hung around my neck, like a token to show
the pain.. the true pain of my loss...
How much can one mind take?
How much pain? How much anguish?
Till I break...
Self Distruction..
From the loss of another...
The loss of my "other half"...
I feel my eyes swell with acid...
My lungs fill with smoke...
And I try too breathe but its impossible from
The over take of feeling...
The over take of you, and you alone..
As you lay your head against my chest,
I run my fingers in your hair..
Feeling it, knowing its still there before me.
I take your hand into mine, and sqeeze it with
All my might, knowing its still in my grasp.
I kiss your lips, sweet and gentlly,
Holding it for only a moment for two..
Before I let go, and look into your eyes,
Seeing you, knowing your still in my arms.
Tears fall like rain from my eyes to your face
You kiss them away, telling me all is well
In Love and War..
To stand strong for you, if not anyone else...
And acid continues to swell my eyes..
My lungs filling with smoke, refusing to
Take in air, To let me breathe, or to let me
Live...
And as I let go of your hand, I feel my heart
Break...
I feel my body begin to numb, my head begin to
Pound...
The feeling of being alone once more, overwelms
My Soul...
And I turn to look back, wishing to see your
Silluette..
Instead I look and see nothing, but a crowd of
Faces..
That I dont know, wishing to only see
Your's...
Wishing to turn back time and just Freeze in
The Moments..
My tears fall, harder then before, Not wanting to
Move...
Just run to you and feel you once more...
Alone..
I walk away, feeling like I left apart of me
Behind..
Like a part of me as just stayed behind,
Dead...
My head pounds...
My body shakes...
My eyes blur...
My lungs close...
And My Heart
STOPS...


I stand here now, not stronger, but no less weaker
Telling myself your my life, just not apart of it
Showing myself this is forever, not to give up..
And remind myself that this isnt the end...
Its only our begining... Forever and Always.
12/29/09 ♥

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My love My beautiful, crazy, wonderful, loving and perfect girlfriend Aiden. I love this girl wit everything I have. I cant stop smiling when im thinking about her and I get giggly and giddy when Im talking to her... Ive rly found what ive been looking for and I never wanna lose it. Shes literally the part of me I thought was lost forever. She gives me alot of self essteem and pushes me to become somthing better, and I dont even think she realizes it. Shes the best thing thats literally ever happened to me and Im not just saying that. Shes my other half in everyway.. Im falling for her so hard and I know this will go far. She asked me If Id marry her in the future, and Im not sure if she was being 100% serious or if she was just asking to ask, ... but In my opinion, this is the girl thats going to me my wife and who im gonna be with for a long time. Ive felt alot for other ppl, but I havent felt this strongly, this quickly about someone in so long and I never want to lose her. I always need her in my life and if she wasnt I rly dont know what id do with myself. Id never cheat on her with anyone because I rly dont think there anyone else out there for me. I want and need this to last and I know it will if we both want it too. I love you baby, more then you'll prolly ever know. It was hard letting u go the first time but I know I cant live if it happens again. I feel like ive known u forever and I feel like this will last ♥3/8/10♥